KhamSarin Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 Sith diary 1 Fear The tool of the sith, it can bring down people, leaders, even entire planets. Fear will destroy all but the sith. I started the day with a screaming Sith pure blood in my face. Although he was sith in race, he was not a Sith in power, not until he beat us all in the trails, which he swore he could. "By the force, you cannot believe you have a chance at beating me in the trails. I am Sith! You are... Alien!!!" "Zabrak. I am a zabrak..." I replied. Being a Zabrak, I was considered 'alien' to the sith empire. My bright orange skin was rare, especially combined with the blue hair weaved in plaits between my crown of tribal horns. My species also knew how to be very independent, and while the fellow trainees would be either cowering in fear or begging for forgiveness by now, I was still making idiotic comments in his ugly slimy face. "Beg for forgiveness, alien slave." He ignited his red lightsabre "Before you lose an arm!" I laughed. "Have you not forgotten that I have not been a slave for almost 3 years." I reached for my own lightsabres, "Anyway. Forgiveness is not the way of the sith" I ignited the yellow sabres and lunged at the Slime. He evaded. He threw in his own strike, which took off one of my horns. "You moron!!!" I screamed. "Learn your place weakling, or you won't make it to the trails, at least you might die with some honour there." I sighed, I really needed to improve my sabre skills if I was going to beat him in the trails. I hoped I would have to fight him, he would make a damn good kill. I would take his life or die trying. If I did that I had a good chance of becoming a Darth, and I could leave my Alien name behind. My birth name is Kham, but I am known to all but one as Alien. The one person who calls me by my name is a Twi'lek named Eluna. She is possibly the closest thing I have to a friend, and if we must fight in the trails, it would be a shame. As soon as slime left (I never called him by his first name, which was Ka'bish) Eluna ran up to me. As well as being a skilled fighter, Eluna had a talent of healing. Even though was a Jedi skill, she still studied and improved her healing in spare time. "Kham! Are you okay? If he had been 2 inches closer to your head, you could be dead!" She said, so quickly I could barely make out what she was saying. Eluna was a very good sith, but she had a caring heart; I feared this could mean her end in the Trails in a days time. "I'm fine," I mumbled, "but I feel quite humiliated, horns are of huge importance to a zabrak's honour..." Oh well, I thought, at least I could use this as rage if I fought Ka'bish, which could give me some power against him. I spent the rest of the day sparring with training droids, improving my strength and tactics was essential. At last it was time for our daily meal. I was starved, but I ignored the weakness. As I entered the hall, I saw Eluna on the floor. Her lower legs were completely gone, the cauterised wound still giving off smoke. Her eyes flashed over to me. "Kham! Look out, Ka'bish and his thugs are knocking out the other contestants! They WILL kill you, you're the strongest opposition to them... Be... Carefu-" she fainted, her pale blue lekku had stopped moving, but I could sense that she was living. Suddenly, the Slime appeared behind me. He brought his sabre to my waist, but I blocked the fatal strike with ease. We had been fighting back and forth for over ten minutes before Darth Zani came into the room. "Cease your fighting at once!!!" She yelled, "you must not fight until the trails!" The slime opened his mouth "I am sorry Lord Zani, but I was trying to defend the poor Twi'lek after this savage alien took her legs. I did the best I could, but I fear it may be to late..." I started to feel the rage tower up inside me. "STOP IT. YOU ARE LYING!!!" I ran up to the Sith blood; Ka'bish was no more. I looked at Lord Zani, and then to Eluna. Then Darth Zani did something I didn't expect. She started to clap. "You have used your rage, and that made you powerful. Alien, I grant you rank of Sith apprentice, MY apprentice." She removed her hood, and to my surprise, a crown of ten perfectly shaped horns, and her tattoos covered her face in darkness. I would no longer be an alien alone; I would be an alien with my master. "Yes," I bowed low to the floor, "my master." "Rise, Darth... Ira, and become my new apprentice. Together, we will show what us 'Aliens' can do!" She let out a dark cackle, and walked towards the door "Now, lets help your friend get home!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amalak Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 Ummm......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lasstn Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 I think i will copy this, and post it on my blog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roalmo Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 oops, darn... i copied it.. now what do i do???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lordmird Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 I shall copy your thread.* *and paste it into the "Fanfiction" section. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratjar Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 Still a better love story than Twilight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thesadplanet Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Sith diary 1 Fear The tool of the sith, it can bring down people, leaders, even entire planets. Fear will destroy all but the sith. I started the day with a screaming Sith pure blood in my face. Although he was sith in race, he was not a Sith in power, not until he beat us all in the trails, which he swore he could. "By the force, you cannot believe you have a chance at beating me in the trails. I am Sith! You are... Alien!!!" "Zabrak. I am a zabrak..." I replied. Being a Zabrak, I was considered 'alien' to the sith empire. My bright orange skin was rare, especially combined with the blue hair weaved in plaits between my crown of tribal horns. My species also knew how to be very independent, and while the fellow trainees would be either cowering in fear or begging for forgiveness by now, I was still making idiotic comments in his ugly slimy face. "Beg for forgiveness, alien slave." He ignited his red lightsabre "Before you lose an arm!" I laughed. "Have you not forgotten that I have not been a slave for almost 3 years." I reached for my own lightsabres, "Anyway. Forgiveness is not the way of the sith" I ignited the yellow sabres and lunged at the Slime. He evaded. He threw in his own strike, which took off one of my horns. "You moron!!!" I screamed. "Learn your place weakling, or you won't make it to the trails, at least you might die with some honour there." I sighed, I really needed to improve my sabre skills if I was going to beat him in the trails. I hoped I would have to fight him, he would make a damn good kill. I would take his life or die trying. If I did that I had a good chance of becoming a Darth, and I could leave my Alien name behind. My birth name is Kham, but I am known to all but one as Alien. The one person who calls me by my name is a Twi'lek named Eluna. She is possibly the closest thing I have to a friend, and if we must fight in the trails, it would be a shame. As soon as slime left (I never called him by his first name, which was Ka'bish) Eluna ran up to me. As well as being a skilled fighter, Eluna had a talent of healing. Even though was a Jedi skill, she still studied and improved her healing in spare time. "Kham! Are you okay? If he had been 2 inches closer to your head, you could be dead!" She said, so quickly I could barely make out what she was saying. Eluna was a very good sith, but she had a caring heart; I feared this could mean her end in the Trails in a days time. "I'm fine," I mumbled, "but I feel quite humiliated, horns are of huge importance to a zabrak's honour..." Oh well, I thought, at least I could use this as rage if I fought Ka'bish, which could give me some power against him. I spent the rest of the day sparring with training droids, improving my strength and tactics was essential. At last it was time for our daily meal. I was starved, but I ignored the weakness. As I entered the hall, I saw Eluna on the floor. Her lower legs were completely gone, the cauterised wound still giving off smoke. Her eyes flashed over to me. "Kham! Look out, Ka'bish and his thugs are knocking out the other contestants! They WILL kill you, you're the strongest opposition to them... Be... Carefu-" she fainted, her pale blue lekku had stopped moving, but I could sense that she was living. Suddenly, the Slime appeared behind me. He brought his sabre to my waist, but I blocked the fatal strike with ease. We had been fighting back and forth for over ten minutes before Darth Zani came into the room. "Cease your fighting at once!!!" She yelled, "you must not fight until the trails!" The slime opened his mouth "I am sorry Lord Zani, but I was trying to defend the poor Twi'lek after this savage alien took her legs. I did the best I could, but I fear it may be to late..." I started to feel the rage tower up inside me. "STOP IT. YOU ARE LYING!!!" I ran up to the Sith blood; Ka'bish was no more. I looked at Lord Zani, and then to Eluna. Then Darth Zani did something I didn't expect. She started to clap. "You have used your rage, and that made you powerful. Alien, I grant you rank of Sith apprentice, MY apprentice." She removed her hood, and to my surprise, a crown of ten perfectly shaped horns, and her tattoos covered her face in darkness. I would no longer be an alien alone; I would be an alien with my master. "Yes," I bowed low to the floor, "my master." "Rise, Darth... Ira, and become my new apprentice. Together, we will show what us 'Aliens' can do!" She let out a dark cackle, and walked towards the door "Now, lets help your friend get home!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UriahF Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 So, I copied this...now what do I do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arkerus Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Now that I copied this, what do I do with it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird_of_Thunder Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 you ran into name copyright. The name Ira is copyrighted by NBC's "The Office". Ira is the name of Dwight's sensei, and you are dishonoring copyright Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cubert Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Sith diary 1 Fear The tool of the sith, it can bring down people, leaders, even entire planets. Fear will destroy all but the sith. I started the day with a screaming Sith pure blood in my face. Although he was sith in race, he was not a Sith in power, not until he beat us all in the trails, which he swore he could. "By the force, you cannot believe you have a chance at beating me in the trails. I am Sith! You are... Alien!!!" "Zabrak. I am a zabrak..." I replied. Being a Zabrak, I was considered 'alien' to the sith empire. My bright orange skin was rare, especially combined with the blue hair weaved in plaits between my crown of tribal horns. My species also knew how to be very independent, and while the fellow trainees would be either cowering in fear or begging for forgiveness by now, I was still making idiotic comments in his ugly slimy face. "Beg for forgiveness, alien slave." He ignited his red lightsabre "Before you lose an arm!" I laughed. "Have you not forgotten that I have not been a slave for almost 3 years." I reached for my own lightsabres, "Anyway. Forgiveness is not the way of the sith" I ignited the yellow sabres and lunged at the Slime. He evaded. He threw in his own strike, which took off one of my horns. "You moron!!!" I screamed. "Learn your place weakling, or you won't make it to the trails, at least you might die with some honour there." I sighed, I really needed to improve my sabre skills if I was going to beat him in the trails. I hoped I would have to fight him, he would make a damn good kill. I would take his life or die trying. If I did that I had a good chance of becoming a Darth, and I could leave my Alien name behind. My birth name is Kham, but I am known to all but one as Alien. The one person who calls me by my name is a Twi'lek named Eluna. She is possibly the closest thing I have to a friend, and if we must fight in the trails, it would be a shame. As soon as slime left (I never called him by his first name, which was Ka'bish) Eluna ran up to me. As well as being a skilled fighter, Eluna had a talent of healing. Even though was a Jedi skill, she still studied and improved her healing in spare time. "Kham! Are you okay? If he had been 2 inches closer to your head, you could be dead!" She said, so quickly I could barely make out what she was saying. Eluna was a very good sith, but she had a caring heart; I feared this could mean her end in the Trails in a days time. "I'm fine," I mumbled, "but I feel quite humiliated, horns are of huge importance to a zabrak's honour..." Oh well, I thought, at least I could use this as rage if I fought Ka'bish, which could give me some power against him. I spent the rest of the day sparring with training droids, improving my strength and tactics was essential. At last it was time for our daily meal. I was starved, but I ignored the weakness. As I entered the hall, I saw Eluna on the floor. Her lower legs were completely gone, the cauterised wound still giving off smoke. Her eyes flashed over to me. "Kham! Look out, Ka'bish and his thugs are knocking out the other contestants! They WILL kill you, you're the strongest opposition to them... Be... Carefu-" she fainted, her pale blue lekku had stopped moving, but I could sense that she was living. Suddenly, the Slime appeared behind me. He brought his sabre to my waist, but I blocked the fatal strike with ease. We had been fighting back and forth for over ten minutes before Darth Zani came into the room. "Cease your fighting at once!!!" She yelled, "you must not fight until the trails!" The slime opened his mouth "I am sorry Lord Zani, but I was trying to defend the poor Twi'lek after this savage alien took her legs. I did the best I could, but I fear it may be to late..." I started to feel the rage tower up inside me. "STOP IT. YOU ARE LYING!!!" I ran up to the Sith blood; Ka'bish was no more. I looked at Lord Zani, and then to Eluna. Then Darth Zani did something I didn't expect. She started to clap. "You have used your rage, and that made you powerful. Alien, I grant you rank of Sith apprentice, MY apprentice." She removed her hood, and to my surprise, a crown of ten perfectly shaped horns, and her tattoos covered her face in darkness. I would no longer be an alien alone; I would be an alien with my master. "Yes," I bowed low to the floor, "my master." "Rise, Darth... Ira, and become my new apprentice. Together, we will show what us 'Aliens' can do!" She let out a dark cackle, and walked towards the door "Now, lets help your friend get home!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawginole Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Oops http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?p=5615531#post5615531 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stradlin Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 (edited) Sith Warrior's Journey Episode I Written by Me, Stradlin Copyriught held by me. If you are a publisher and wish to distribute this story, I am sure we can reach an agreement. The Warrior's Journey Space..space never changes. Stars and planets are the eternal slaves of their trajectories. Bright, predictable and boring. One of those stars is the star that has a planet orbitting it that we all know of and that planet has a name and that name is Korriban. We leave clockwork of Galaxy going through her endless routine and pan and zoom the camera closer to Korriban. As we grow closer,we see a cruel, dry red planet instead of but a distant bright spot that could just as well be another star. We grow closer still and realize that red stuff is sand. Ever closer we go. Eventually we see Shuttle Bay and some bald dude with body type 3. That bald dude is Me, Stradlin. None of the insects in uniform dared to approach me or suggest I should move on. If you radiate enough hatred and awaken enough fear in those around you, those around you are not keen in taking away the space around you. So I had all the time in the world to arrange my action bars. For like a thosandtgh time, I had to rebind strafing to A and D seriously it is so *********** annoying who the **** would want to use these particular portions of WASD in turning instead of strafing only noobs turn aaarghh. I could feel the magnificent, beautiful fuel that is nerd rage igniting my heart a blaze. I knew it was time to move on even if I hadn't done all my keybinds yet. Barack Obama wanted me to go bash stuff in some cave so I did that. When I returned, he decided to send me to another cave to bash some stuff there. Then into another cave I went. And another..and another, and into one more cave after that. Then I bashed stuff in a cave. Conviniently enough many a people, all insects and fools, where hanging around these caves and wanted me to do stuff for them too. Which I of course did. After visitting final cave some dude wanted me to go visit a dude in Acedemy and then go back to cave entrance to tell another dude what guard dude in academy had said so there was lot iof back and forth and then I killed the ol B-Rock dude who send me to the caves to begin with and then I bought new talents omg I hadnt remembered to do this in 2 lvls it would have been great to have that spin thing sooner ffs and then I left Korriban. Thusly the evil Sith Warrior that is me got unleashed upon the Galaxy. He spend 1st week occasionally logging in trying to find cheap Wind Crystals off GTN cause my main needs them and is not often in Fleet to search GTN himself. The end. TO BE CONTINUED ©2012 Stradlin All rights reserved. Edited December 21, 2012 by Stradlin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hellbrass Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Why would i want to copy it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lunafox Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 You know, OP, you might have found a more receptive and less vicious audience had you posted your story in the 'Community' forum, under Fan Fiction, sub forum. There are many writers there, who do quality work, and if you wish to exchange feedback and stories, it's probably best done there. Also a friendly tip to you...don't put, 'don't copy' in your header, it just smacks of amateur. No one is going to copy your work and if they do, you can report them to the forum people. People usually write disclaimers that Star Wars or anything to do with it is not their property, and that they are only playing with the universe, that the only thing of yours, is your original character. I hope that helps. You'll find people are kinder, and you'll get better feed back in the Community Fan Fiction forum. I wrote one too, I'm rather proud of it, its called The Well of Undying. If I were more forum savy, I'd have made that title into a link, lol. Have fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KhamSarin Posted December 21, 2012 Author Share Posted December 21, 2012 you ran into name copyright. The name Ira is copyrighted by NBC's "The Office". Ira is the name of Dwight's sensei, and you are dishonoring copyright Am I?! Oh... I just used the Spanish word for anger, never knew about that, sorry I'll change it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KhamSarin Posted December 21, 2012 Author Share Posted December 21, 2012 You know, OP, you might have found a more receptive and less vicious audience had you posted your story in the 'Community' forum, under Fan Fiction, sub forum. There are many writers there, who do quality work, and if you wish to exchange feedback and stories, it's probably best done there. Also a friendly tip to you...don't put, 'don't copy' in your header, it just smacks of amateur. No one is going to copy your work and if they do, you can report them to the forum people. People usually write disclaimers that Star Wars or anything to do with it is not their property, and that they are only playing with the universe, that the only thing of yours, is your original character. I hope that helps. You'll find people are kinder, and you'll get better feed back in the Community Fan Fiction forum. I wrote one too, I'm rather proud of it, its called The Well of Undying. If I were more forum savy, I'd have made that title into a link, lol. Have fun. Ok, I'm kind of new to forums, to tor actually... Yeah, I dunno if its just me, but I could find the fan fiction section anywhere, I'll try again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TUXs Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Part 1?! How many parts are you making?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spookysage Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Ok, I'm kind of new to forums, to tor actually... Yeah, I dunno if its just me, but I could find the fan fiction section anywhere, I'll try again It's in the Community section. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maestruljedi Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Sith Warrior's Journey Episode I Written by Me, Stradlin Copyriught held by me. If you are a publisher and wish to distribute this story, I am sure we can reach an agreement. <snip> This is gold. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnoggyMack Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Part 1?! How many parts are you making?! It's a Star Wars story, so I'm guessing Trilogy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatghost Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 You'll find people are kinder, and you'll get better feed back in the Community Fan Fiction forum. ^This. There are terrific folks in the Fan Fiction forum, glad your thread was moved so you needn't deal with snarky remarks anymore- just encouragement and constructive criticism (if you ask for it) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird_of_Thunder Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 Am I?! Oh... I just used the Spanish word for anger, never knew about that, sorry I'll change it im kidding dude Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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