Autism and MMO gaming

[zeron]

Sorry about any spelling,grammar errors as I as it not my strong points as well as the wall of text that is coming

 

 

Im austic im not going to hide that anymore, i have been able to hid that for a good amount of time now under the avatar in various mmo i have played since 1999. I havent put that on any guild appilcation. It was greating being able to down raid boss first be it server first or world first in various mmo games and have the rest of the raid group not even know I am disable (what a dirty word i know that most don't want to know about). While others played Goldeneye on their N64 or socialized with others in the real world, i was logged in virtual world where everyone could see me as a normal gamer. During this time I was extreme shy and anisocial, was having lots of trouble in school and such. My parents didnt see these mmo as a way to socialize at the time they still pushed me to socialize in a normal way, creating friends and such but for me that never happened it was all done in mmo space. I tended to stay outside of forums post and such due to their flame and troll nature, and figured they were a small and minor part of the playerbase.

 

Fast forward 2003, now I have riding horse since I was 5 years old (pretty odd combine Equestrian and Gaming), I was able to go to the world Special Olymics in Ireland 2003, there was other issues going on at this time (i want to fly with parents instead of the team, I was 15 at the time, the story ended up on the front page of the local newspaper), the head of the special Olymics New york didnt want me to go, it was messy and everything seemed to have bad odds on me to lose. Well that didnt happen at all I end up with a Gold and Silver Medal. Now I have beaten the odds twice once in the virtual world and once in the real world so what the heck does this have to do with mmo gaming well the next goal was to move into game development in mmo's which had a drastic effect on my life. Well after this whole o deal I started to attend Digital Life in NY . In 2006 I throught i would try my hand in the pro tournament in quake 4 end up getting through the amuters round and won a seed for the pro tournament end up getting knocked out in the first around, without anyone knowing I was austic. Also between this time I end up passing my A+ exam and I was getting pushed to move into IT work instead of game Development. So game development was push to the backburner for awhile

 

Flash forward to 2009 I end up associate with honors in IT doing pretty good so far not bad for being disable. Around this time I start to get serious about getting into game development and doing something about it, So i attend NY Comic con went to all the panels and such. So I start looking into schools for game development I knew a little bit about game development from various mod tools I played around with. It was also around this time my parrents took me to settle to go visit digipen (Got accepted into but could afford to go to), and Pax 09. I also attend Pax East the following year where I found my current college i attend to for game development Becker College. I wanted to go to digipen and parrents want me to go Becker college (alot of fighting went on about this) ended up at becker college due to cost. Attended PAX 2010 and PAX east 2011, ended up skiping Pax Prime 2011 due to the fact college started up there. Becker college wasnt a bad choice after all it turned out to be as it had a Equestrain Program. So between that and game development I dont have much free time anymore (I put around 60-80 hours week in school projects to make up a mack development job which from what i been told and read is a 60-80 hour work week). So everything is going good here so far Im on the Equestrain team at college, im working at getting my dream degree, What could get better right? Well it did get better my Mid term Project (we only had 3 weeks which i ended up dumping around 270 hours on) was a space ship Shmup which was in turn a clone of one the greatest Shmups created Ikaruga (there was a oringal gameplay idea which I wanted to play out, but time didnt allow it, however i was able to build a protype of it). Well the game ended up at the college booth at pax east 2012. This is all great beating all kinds of odds stacked on me. Add to this I get to go to E3 this year (granted I rather goto GDC than the press and media blitz that is E3 but GDC is very limited to students). It also helps that a very surportive family that paid for the flight, hotel, etc to E3,PAX, PAX east, ETC..

 

 

So what the heck does all have to do with autism and MMO gaming that I just ranted on about well it would more then likely never would happen if I couldnt move out of my shell, and MMO have let do that. Do I think that MMO's would help more austic folk like me yes but but there one gaint problem these day in MMO's the community, It not very friendly today compare to what is back to 1999. Now there have been alot improvements to allow austic folks to play mmo's the lower cost of entry today, easy of use, better guided tools, etc. If MMO were same today back in 1999 would have been differnce i dont know. But what i Do know it has allow me grow as person to where i am today, with the future hopefully getting me into the game development feild and hopefully MMO's

[DuckKing]

TOR sucks, yea I went there.

[DarkZeron]

So this is the guy who stole my name...

[Skoobie]

TOR sucks, yea I went there.

 

And also proved his point.

 

You're right zeron, about the community.

 

I hope to play a game you worked on someday!

Edited August 4, 2012 by Skoobie

[Synxos]

nice story.

you're right, the community thing is a pretty big issue for mmos these days.

people like to say WoW was great for the mmo market because it brought in a TON of new people.

The problem is it brought in a ton of *******es. I'd say it was much more of a curse for MMOs than a blessing.

Edited August 4, 2012 by Synxos

[Flyceratops]

Eh, MMOs (since they encourage social interaction) can help people with social anxiety lose said anxiety and can do a lot of good things for shut-ins (assuming these people don't spend all of their time playing the game, anyway). I wouldn't say this is an issue specific to high-functioning autism; it's much wider than that. The reason that autistic people have social anxiety is different from the reason a neurotypical person might have, but the key here is not the autism but the anxiety.

 

MMOs are good things for some people and terrible things for others; the thing of value here is moderation. Spend too much time playing the game and it becomes an extremely unhealthy habit; spend three hours a week playing the game and you'll see no (negative or positive) effect on your health.

 

With video games (and most other hobbies), it can become extremely unhealthy (mentally, if not physically) to spend most of your free time playing them; however, it isn't unhealthy in any way if you play for fifteen minutes a week (though I doubt it's worth the subscription money then).

 

I'd say for people with social anxiety, they need a healthy medium, a microphone and activities out of the home that they do; if you play the game regularly enough, but not to an unhealthy extreme, it can do a lot for you - but it won't do a thing if you don't spend time outside of your house.

 

Edit: Note that I have lots of experience with high-functioning autism and like disorders; I have nonverbal learning disorder, one of my brothers and my father have Aspergers Syndrome, and since I have an IEP I'm in a special ed homeroom and special ed study hall and have a lot of interaction with people who have these kinds of issues.

 

Note to y'all with NLD/Aspergers, if you don't practice consideration for others and actually listen to what they say, that might be 98% of the problem for a chronic lack of friendly relationships with others. Nobody wants to talk to a guy who thinks a conversation is a college lecture and not a two-way street.

Edited August 4, 2012 by Flyceratops

[Briq]

one of my best friends has a son with aspergers. he's highly functioning with the support from his family, some medication and some changes to his diet. but lemme tell you, this kid really rocks at video games.

 

I'm really glad gaming could help you come out of your shell

Edited August 4, 2012 by Briq

[Blackardin]

Sorry about any spelling,grammar errors as I as it not my strong points as well as the wall of text that is coming

 

 

Im austic im not going to hide that anymore, i have been able to hid that for a good amount of time now under the avatar in various mmo i have played since 1999. I havent put that on any guild appilcation. It was greating being able to down raid boss first be it server first or world first in various mmo games and have the rest of the raid group not even know I am disable (what a dirty word i know that most don't want to know about). While others played Goldeneye on their N64 or socialized with others in the real world, i was logged in virtual world where everyone could see me as a normal gamer. During this time I was extreme shy and anisocial, was having lots of trouble in school and such. My parents didnt see these mmo as a way to socialize at the time they still pushed me to socialize in a normal way, creating friends and such but for me that never happened it was all done in mmo space. I tended to stay outside of forums post and such due to their flame and troll nature, and figured they were a small and minor part of the playerbase.

 

Fast forward 2003, now I have riding horse since I was 5 years old (pretty odd combine Equestrian and Gaming), I was able to go to the world Special Olymics in Ireland 2003, there was other issues going on at this time (i want to fly with parents instead of the team, I was 15 at the time, the story ended up on the front page of the local newspaper), the head of the special Olymics New york didnt want me to go, it was messy and everything seemed to have bad odds on me to lose. Well that didnt happen at all I end up with a Gold and Silver Medal. Now I have beaten the odds twice once in the virtual world and once in the real world so what the heck does this have to do with mmo gaming well the next goal was to move into game development in mmo's which had a drastic effect on my life. Well after this whole o deal I started to attend Digital Life in NY . In 2006 I throught i would try my hand in the pro tournament in quake 4 end up getting through the amuters round and won a seed for the pro tournament end up getting knocked out in the first around, without anyone knowing I was austic. Also between this time I end up passing my A+ exam and I was getting pushed to move into IT work instead of game Development. So game development was push to the backburner for awhile

 

Flash forward to 2009 I end up associate with honors in IT doing pretty good so far not bad for being disable. Around this time I start to get serious about getting into game development and doing something about it, So i attend NY Comic con went to all the panels and such. So I start looking into schools for game development I knew a little bit about game development from various mod tools I played around with. It was also around this time my parrents took me to settle to go visit digipen (Got accepted into but could afford to go to), and Pax 09. I also attend Pax East the following year where I found my current college i attend to for game development Becker College. I wanted to go to digipen and parrents want me to go Becker college (alot of fighting went on about this) ended up at becker college due to cost. Attended PAX 2010 and PAX east 2011, ended up skiping Pax Prime 2011 due to the fact college started up there. Becker college wasnt a bad choice after all it turned out to be as it had a Equestrain Program. So between that and game development I dont have much free time anymore (I put around 60-80 hours week in school projects to make up a mack development job which from what i been told and read is a 60-80 hour work week). So everything is going good here so far Im on the Equestrain team at college, im working at getting my dream degree, What could get better right? Well it did get better my Mid term Project (we only had 3 weeks which i ended up dumping around 270 hours on) was a space ship Shmup which was in turn a clone of one the greatest Shmups created Ikaruga (there was a oringal gameplay idea which I wanted to play out, but time didnt allow it, however i was able to build a protype of it). Well the game ended up at the college booth at pax east 2012. This is all great beating all kinds of odds stacked on me. Add to this I get to go to E3 this year (granted I rather goto GDC than the press and media blitz that is E3 but GDC is very limited to students). It also helps that a very surportive family that paid for the flight, hotel, etc to E3,PAX, PAX east, ETC..

 

 

So what the heck does all have to do with autism and MMO gaming that I just ranted on about well it would more then likely never would happen if I couldnt move out of my shell, and MMO have let do that. Do I think that MMO's would help more austic folk like me yes but but there one gaint problem these day in MMO's the community, It not very friendly today compare to what is back to 1999. Now there have been alot improvements to allow austic folks to play mmo's the lower cost of entry today, easy of use, better guided tools, etc. If MMO were same today back in 1999 would have been differnce i dont know. But what i Do know it has allow me grow as person to where i am today, with the future hopefully getting me into the game development feild and hopefully MMO's

 

I've finally found something of worth on these forums, something to make me take pause, put things in perspective.

 

Thank you for that, OP. Very well stated. A ray of hope.

Edited August 4, 2012 by Blackardin

[Fornix]

So this is the guy who stole my name...

 

Rofl .

[Mdgshorty]

Thank you for telling your story. I think its great that you told this as its an inspiration to others out there like you and other type of people that have other types disabilities. I know the community can be brutal, but there still quite a few people out there that are not this way. MMOs are great for people to get out of their shell.

[General_Jaye]

Thank you for posting your story OP

Its great to hear that you have found a platform in which to feel comfortable socializing.

 

Stay Gold.

[TKMaster]

And also proved his point.

 

You're right zeron, about the community.

 

I hope to play a game you worked on someday!

 

Yep, ppl claim it's not the MMO comunities that destroy games....i say they've damn sure not helped like they used to do. Make no mistake, it wont be game design that kills the genre, it'll be the trolls and e-thugs.

 

Keep defying the odds OP, ppl like you will be the inspirations i can show my son who's also mildly autistic.

Edited August 5, 2012 by TKMaster

[DevonDs]

And also proved his point.

 

You're right zeron, about the community.

 

I hope to play a game you worked on someday!

 

Well said. I've noticed people with jawa avs tend to often say really cool things.

OP..... Keep on.....keep on ...ignore the jerks and keep on.

[RazielHex]

So this is the guy who stole my name...

 

Technically, he had the name first.

If it was your name, you'd be in possession of it.

 

You just have the same tastes as that of an autistic man, that's all. He was just quicker than you.

[DarkZeron]

You just have the same tastes as that of an autistic man, that's all. He was just quicker than you.

 

You do know, you are insulting him now, not me right?

[RazielHex]

You do know, you are insulting him now, not me right?

 

Of course not. Why would you take my comment that way?

[Darth-Rammstein]

You just have the same tastes as that of an autistic man, that's all. He was just quicker than you.

 

It's like an insult and a joke rolled into one, I like it.

[Mallorik]

Great story!, i wish i had the drive to stand up to my parents when they laughed at me when i said i wanted to get into developing video games, i was alway embarrased of it though and hid it from all of my friends (even to this day lol) To this day when something in the news comes up about multi million dollar games my mom says, "youre good at games, you should have done that!" and i have to bite my lip.

 

And youre not the only one that rides and plays mmos! i was born and raised on a cattle ranch and Roped, rode saddle bronc and bulldogged through highschool college and 4 years pro.

 

I also agree with you 100% about the change in the mmo community, i too started playing in 1999 (eq1) and the difference in the communites is shocking. I just attribute it to mmos going main stream and becoming so easy and mindless that nobody really cares about their characters or their reputation anymore.

[Mallorik]

Yep, ppl claim it's not the MMO comunities that destroy games....i say they've damn sure not helped like they used to do. Make no mistake, it wont be game design that kills the genre, it'll be the trolls and e-thugs.

 

Keep defying the odds OP, ppl like you will be the inspirations i can show my son who's also mildly autistic.

 

I think its both, the public are a-holes, younger people are bigger a-holes. When games opened up to more people it brought in more a-holes. Wait untiul you see how many a-holes f2p brings in lol.

 

Its also game mechanics, back in the days of early eq1, people didnt have alts. It took the average pretty hard core player 6 months to get to level 50 so you really cared about that character. Once there you needed 60 people to Raid or atleast a full group just to get anything done, so if you were a jerk and nobody liked you, you were screwed.

 

Those days are gone, now people level to 50 in a week or two, have full raid gear in another week or two and have 4 level 50 alts they can jump back and forth to. Ive said it many times before, i would kill to have a remake of eq1 with modern graphics, or atleast a game with the same hardcore rules.

Edited August 5, 2012 by Mallorik

[GalacticKegger]

And also proved his point.

 

You're right zeron, about the community.

 

I hope to play a game you worked on someday!

OP ... I raised both a psych prof and an FBI CT tactics instructor whose dissertation was on chaos theory and the use of deadly force. I'm familiar with the edge. I also have an autistic neice. She is filed under being incapable of "functioning" in society, does daily hand-eye and takes medication to keep her twitch reactions to peak mental stimuli in check. But damned if she doesn't have a hyperphotographic memory. She has total recall of EVERYTHING. She is incapable of forgetting ... both a gift and a curse that would make most everyone else's brain explode.

 

Autistic people are genius in amazing ways, and wanting to be socially active is a natural thing. It's what separates we humans from cockroaches. Forums are a tough road to hoe in that regard though because its social interaction is faceless. Regrettably that is license enough to abuse for many. Too many unfortunately. So your point is well taken.

 

TMI for sure. Just know you are not on an island because there are folks in here who really do care about how other people feel.

Edited August 5, 2012 by GalacticKegger

[pocketthesaurus]

Since you did it, OP, I can do it, too:

 

I am an Aspie, and video games helped me, too. I've probably had less problems than you overall - my weird quirkiness was seen as funny/cute when I was younger. As I became older, though, it caused problems and actually pushed me to be more introverted. MMOs have helped me out with that... Sure, there are horrible people that play (and I agree that they are more common than they were 10 years ago), but I don't let them push me back and nobody should. They are more common, but still a minority. I take the best of what people do and say and run with that... And in the end, talking to people and working with people in groups helps me talk to people in every day life. (Plus I can make off-color comments and say weird things that come to mind without any real, lasting consequences like it would in every day life. This helps keep me grounded in reality and what is socially accepted so I don't have problems in real life.)

[zeron]

Good to see Im not alone out here

[vian]

OP; this post made me so happy.

 

There are a lot of people on the spectrum who, just like you, have nonetheless found their passions and their talents, and are doing great things. So, go you! And it's wonderful that MMOs have been such a good way to help.

 

Wouldn't it be great if you could combine your love of equestrianism and gaming? I wonder if the Skyrim people need someone who really knows horses for their upcoming MMO. Actually, there's a lot of MMOs that could use a more realistic riding system ... just saying ...

[GarfieldJL]

I'm also one the spectrum, and wasn't diagnosed until just before I started college.

 

I think MMOs are helpful in some ways because it evens the playing field quite a bit and we often don't have to process quite as much as we would in the real world.

 

I just view it as a difference in cognitive style.