Short story: L2P!
Longer story: this is NOT X-Wing, TIE Fighter, Rogue Squadron, even the poor excuses for an X-Wing clones that existed is Star Wars Galaxies, it is not even Freelancer (which I find GSF resembles the most). This is different game that you need to learn anew. Having skill in those games is probably helpful to get you started, but by no means will it make you awesome right from the start. For that, you need the correct loadout upgraded a bit at least and lots and lots of practice.
From your post I understand that you played all those games on a joystick/gamepad, correct? I presume that's why you find the controls "awful". Personally, I spent 1000s of hours on Freelancer where the controls are quite similar and I had no problems adjusting. Check out the controls in the options and play around with them, see what suits you the most.
As for the tutorial: yes, I agree, it is awful, that's why you gotta stick with the awful results at the start, but you will learn and notice progress as you practice. Alternatively, I can suggest playing Freelancer SP at least, it is a great game and should give you at least SOME practice. I doubt the price is more than a few bucks.
And for the end, read this:
http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=737470
and this:
http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=729222 (whole threat would be prefferable, but it is quite long and quite a bit of advanced stuff there, so not really mandatory)
and if you still have questions, this:
http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=741384
And, of course, find a skilled pilot (from your own observation, aces list on these forums... whatever you like) and ask questions, ask them to fly with you, ask them to explain things to you, I'm pretty sure most wouldn't mind teaching.