Ninety Seven Percent

[irishfino]

I not going to tell how wriet when in dream or so.

 

You should write like this:

Get up,” he said quietly. “Mother… please… get up.”

 

“She’s dead, boy,” his father said harshly.

 

“But… but why?” the boy sobbed.

 

“Quit your pathetic sniveling or you’re next.”

 

That just my opation don't let get u down

 

During that piece, it was already established they were in his head.

[irishfino]

I've been on a bit of a writing binge lately. Here's some more just because.

 

 

 

The Captain woke up slowly. He felt echoes of pain on his back, but it was light compared to how he usually woke up. He stared at the top of his bunk in thought. There weren’t many people who knew he had been banished to Balmorra for a second time. Disguise generators worked best with people of the same body type. Syla and Jaesa were built similarly. His eyes widened in realization. Ovech had gotten tipped off shortly after that, but hadn’t had room on his detail at the time. Yes, yes he remembered now. When he was in the med bay after his failed assassination attempt someone had left supplies well within his reach to use on himself. He was sure he was dead when his windpipe was crushed, but someone had thoughtfully sliced into his trachea and placed a support valve in the incision to help him breathe.

 

Hastily, he dressed for the day and sought out Syla. He could do this. He could talk to her about the Transponder Station and the after effects. He swallowed roughly and nearly turned around when he spotted Jaesa speaking animatedly with Barnabus about something or other. She turned and flashed him a brilliant smile. He nodded respectfully then headed to the cargo bay where Syla was likely training with Broonmark.

 

He stepped into the cargo bay to find Syla on the floor meditating. This wasn’t her usual meditation time.

 

“My Lord?” he asked evenly, standing in the doorway.

 

“Captain,” she responded.

 

“May I speak with you about something?”

 

“Can you, is a better question,” she said calmly.

 

“Quite,” he said quietly. “It’s about Balmorra.”

 

She opened her eyes and stared at him. “What about it?”

 

“When you left me there, I was healed just enough to be able to stand trial and be punished for my actions aboard the Transponder Station,” he explained quietly. “After my punishment was dealt, I woke up a day or so later in the base’s medical facilities. Jaesa was there. Did you send her?”

 

Syla studied him with a critical eye. He appeared calm, but she could feel the nervousness and fear wafting from him. She didn’t like it as much as she used to.

 

“I sent her there on a diplomatic mission,” she answered evenly.

 

“No other reason?”

 

“What are you getting at, Captain?” she asked impatiently.

 

He swallowed and tugged his collar. “Nothing, my Lord,” he said lamely. “It was clearly a coincidence.”

 

“You have a hard time telling the truth around me, don’t you Captain?” Syla said accusingly.

 

“I – I have a hard time talking to you at all, my Lord,” he stuttered pathetically.

 

“Her mission was to ensure you didn’t receive the death penalty. I wanted to make sure you suffered.”

 

“I continue to suffer every day, my Lord,” he said stiffly.

 

“Then I’m satisfied,” she said with a smirk.

 

“One more question, my Lord.”

 

“Shoot,” she said with a wave of her hand.

 

“I have it on good authority that it wasn’t actually Jaesa there, but someone disguised as her.” He watched the Sith Lord on the floor stiffen. Emboldened, he went for the killing shot. “It was you, wasn’t it?”

 

“What are you implying, Captain?” she asked calmly. He knew that tone of voice. It sent a shiver down his spine, but he worked to suppress it.

 

“It wasn’t Jaesa on Balmorra at all. It was you,” he said firmly.

 

Syla smiled to herself and stood from the floor. She clasped her hands behind her back and stalked toward him. To his credit, he drew himself up as much as he could and braced himself for impact. She wrapped a hand around his collar and bent him until they were face to face.

 

“It was Jaesa,” she said quietly.

 

“Why are you lying to me?” he asked boldly.

 

Her lips curled into a snarl and before he could react be found himself on the receiving end of a well-placed head butt. He winced, but did not falter. Instead he found himself reacting in self-defense. Syla was on her back, pinned under him faster that he had time to think about what he was doing. He grabbed her wrists and pinned her arms to her chest. She tried to kick out from under him, but he pinned her thighs down with his knees. It was just enough to keep her from kicking him and just painful enough for her to stop fighting. At least for a while.

 

“You’re as bad as Baras,” he hissed angrily. “Interfering where you don’t belong. You just couldn’t leave well enough alone could you?”

 

“Well look at you, finally relying on your true self to confront me rather than Quinn,” she shot back angrily.

 

“Tell me why!” he demanded.

 

“Why should I?!”

 

He grabbed the front of her robes, lifted her a few inches from the ground then slammed her back down.

 

“Tell me why you’ve continued to interfere with my life!” he yelled.

 

“Because I loved you!” she shouted angrily.

 

He blinked. “What?” he asked hoarsely.

 

“I was falling in love with you,” she said quietly. “It was a weakness. So I pushed you away. It was for the best, you scheming bastard.”

 

He opened his mouth to speak, but his mind was blank. He looked down at her with a pained expression.

“You can get off me now,” she said bitterly.

 

He released his hold on her. “You should have told me,” he said quietly. He moved to the side until he was fully off her.

 

“It wouldn’t have changed anything,” she said angrily as she sat up.

 

“We’ll never know,” he said hoarsely. He got up and left without another word. He headed straight for his refresher where he promptly vomited. What the hell was he doing?

 

 

Notes:

 

 

It's a bit of a butt thing to do, but this might be the last update for a few days.

 

Edited August 28, 2012 by irishfino

[ragnnerok]

love the way the story is coming. Just exellent.

[irishfino]

love the way the story is coming. Just exellent.

 

Thank you

 

 

Thanks for reading everyone!

[irishfino]

Next part up in a few minutes...

[irishfino]

Captain Quinn and Syla didn’t speak about what had happened in the cargo bay to each other or any of the crew. They kept it to themselves and dealt with it individually. Syla used Pierce to vent her frustrations both in combat and in the bedroom. Quinn examined efficiency reports and meditated with Jaesa. They avoided each other well enough until Major Ovech’s grand gala birthday party. Quinn gathered the crew into the conference room for a briefing over room placements.

 

“Room placements are as follows,” Quinn said stiffly. “Vette and Barnabus, you will be next to each other in separate rooms.” Vette sighed with relief and Barnabus chuckled. “Lieutenant Pierce and Madam Wrath, I have arranged two different rooms as I am unsure of your relationship.” He looked at Syla expectantly.

 

“Together,” she said firmly.

 

“Separate,” Pierce said at the same time. Pierce turned to her with an arched brow. “Don’t make this more awkward than it has to be.”

 

He grinned as if he had just set off a most impressive display of explosives. “Together, then.”

 

Quinn nodded and pressed a few things on his datapad. “That leaves one room open for crew use.” He put his datapad away and addressed the group. “We will rendezvous with Major Ovech’s ship in six hours. There will be a few dignitaries in the hangar to meet and greet Madam Wrath. The rest of us are free to leave and head to our respective quarters for the duration of our stay. I will send itineraries to your datapads with more specific information. Any questions?”

 

Vette’s hand shot up. Quinn exhaled through his nose and nodded at her.

 

“I noticed you didn’t mention where you and Jaesa were staying,” she said innocently. “And what about poor Broonmark?”

 

“Broonmark doesn’t like crowds of things he cannot murder,” Quinn said stiffly. Broonmark blorped in agreement. “He is to stay on the ship and enter a temporary hibernative state.”

 

“Or drink all the wine onboard,” Broonmark blipped.

 

Quinn blinked at Broonmark then pulled his datapad for translation. “Stay away from my private stores and you’ll be fine,” he said congenially.

 

“Almost forgiven for betrayal of Sith clan,” Broonmark blorped. Quinn looked down at his datapad then nodded at Broonmark.

 

“You still haven’t mentioned where Jaesa is staying,” Vette sang happily.

 

“I’m staying with the Captain,” Jaesa said firmly.

 

“No,” Syla said harshly.

 

“He can’t be alone on that ship,” Jaesa argued quietly. “His dreams –” She stopped when Quinn cleared his throat. He shook his head subtly.

 

“Yeah, yeah Captain Screamer,” Vette sighed.

 

Quinn shot her an angry look. Vette stuck out her tongue then smiled at him.

 

“We all have things in our past that resurface from time to time,” he paused, “Ce’na.”

 

“Hey, a**hole,” Vette yelled, slamming her fists on the conference room table, “only family can call me that!”

 

“Enough!” Syla shouted.

 

Vette huffed and sat back in her seat angrily. Quinn cleared his face of emotion and bowed slightly to Syla.

 

“The room you and Jaesa will share, what is the set up?” Syla asked calmly.

 

“There are two beds, a private changing area separate from the refresher, and a settee,” he answered dutifully.

 

“When did you make these arrangements?”

 

“I made the room adjustments as I made the arrangements for the crew.”

 

“I don’t like this,” Vette muttered.

 

“It’s a good thing no one asked you,” Quinn said haughtily.

 

Vette made to jump over the table, only a look from Jaesa stopped her. Stupid naïve Jedi.

 

“If that is all, I will alert you when we are an hour away from our destination. Good day,” he said stiffly.

 

The crew shuffled out slowly. Vette bumped into Quinn on the way out and was unhappy to find him unresponsive to her baiting. Barnabus stayed at the table expectantly while Jaesa lingered a bit in the doorway. Barnabus waved her away and smiled. She left rather reluctantly and grew nervous when the conference room door slid shut.

 

“You’re overloaded aren’t you?” Barnabus asked calmly.

 

Quinn nodded stiffly and moved to sit near the man.

 

“There’s only one cure for that,” Barnabus said, licking his lips.

 

Quinn nodded again and worked to remove his jacket. He had been working for the last few days to control his anger and keep from channeling the darker side of himself. It was causing an expected, but painful, back up in excess energies. Gloves, bracers, and jacket removed, he presented Barnabus with his upturned, naked forearm. Immediately, the old man latched onto it with both hands, digging his nails into Quinn’s flesh. He flinched in pain. He hated this part, but it’s what kept Barnabus alive.

 

It was one of many things that Barnabus had revealed to him on Tatooine: the whole point of his sudden contact with his grandson, the whole point of unleashing that dark Quinn inside of him, the whole point of convincing Jaesa to bring him onboard. When he found balance within himself, Barnabus’ job would be done and he could die peacefully, but he could not live with the knowledge that there was an incredibly unstable Quinn loose in the galaxy. It would do more than tarnish the family name. Slowly, the younger man was beginning to understand. Slowly, he was accepting his fate. Slowly, he was accepting the fact that he had been used his entire life and that this would be his last chance to start down his own path.

 

Tendrils of dark energy seeped from the small wounds on the Captain’s forearms. They were burning and freezing at the same time. The tendrils trailed a smoky path up Barnabus’ arms as they moved toward his head. Barnabus parted his lips and inhaled deeply. The smoky energy entered his body quickly. Satisfied, he released the Captain’s arm and licked his lips.

 

“I need to find a better way to do this,” Quinn said quietly. He laid his head back onto the chair and closed his eyes.

 

“In time, lad,” Barnabus said gently.

 

Quinn shuddered in pain as his body adjusted to the sudden void in his energy supply. He exhaled through his nose and shifted in his seat. Every nerve was on fire; ice pumped through his veins. It was Tatooine and the vision pond all over again.

 

“Relax, lad,” Barnabus said gently. “Shift if you need to.”

 

Quinn closed his eyes and steadied his breathing with great effort.

 

“That really hurts, old man,” he said bitterly.

 

“But I rather much like it,” Barnabus said lowly, leaning across the table.

 

“I know you do, you sick bastard.”

 

“Runs in the family.”

 

Quinn chuckled under his breath. “That it does.”

 

“There is something I must know,” Barnabus said quietly. Quinn opened his eyes and fixed him with an orange gaze. “You and Jaesa. What exactly is going on there?”

 

“That’s the question of the decade, dearest grandfather,” Quinn said lightly. “Captain likes her, I like her, even little Malavai likes her.”

 

“That’s obvious.”

 

“Never said it wasn’t,” Quinn said blithely.

 

“What are you intentions?” Barnabus asked seriously.

 

Quinn focused his eyes on the far wall. Everyone was asking him this question lately and he had been thinking it over for hours on end to the point of distraction.

 

“If she makes a move,” he said carefully, “I wouldn’t be adverse to the interaction.” He paused for a second and chewed the inside of his cheek. “The Captain might have a damn heart attack, though.”

 

“You’re the same person.”

 

“We’re working on it,” Quinn said offhandedly.

 

“Take your time, lad,” Barnabus said quietly.

 

“Afraid of death?” Quinn asked harshly.

 

Barnabus shook his head. “Afraid of leaving you alone still in fragments.”

 

“How thoughtful,” Quinn mused.

 

“I protect my own.”

 

“And sign them up to be experimented on,” Quinn said evenly.

 

“If you could have been Sith, you would have greater protection that I could have ever managed,” Barnabus said quietly. “I’m a selfish old man.”

 

“And I’m a petulant child,” Quinn murmured.

 

“But we’re family.”

 

“Indeed.”

 

 

Notes:

 

 

Ah, family. Such a pain in the... arm? Or something... anyway...

 

Part of Quinn's instability comes from his innate inability to control the Force as it builds up inside him. He hasn't figured out how to release it on his own just yet. That comes later.

 

[Reil]

I not going to tell how wriet when in dream or so.

 

You should write like this:

Get up,” he said quietly. “Mother… please… get up.”

 

“She’s dead, boy,” his father said harshly.

 

“But… but why?” the boy sobbed.

 

“Quit your pathetic sniveling or you’re next.”

 

That just my opation don't let get u down

 

During that piece, it was already established they were in his head.

 

That sequence you pulled up, greyjedibp, is correctly written due to it being witnessed from a character's POV. Quinn or Jaesa were consciously watching. It's considered related to writing out a character's realtime thoughts. Of the three way's italics are generally accepted, this method signals that the POV is "inside a character's head". But, no italics are used when a dream is viewed from the 3rd Person POV. It may have been his dream memory but we were the POV until the moment he woke up. That's the difference. Of course any writer may take creative license if it gets their point across

 

I admit I was fully disoriented as well simply because my brain couldn't accept not knowing when this event happened within the greater timeline. It was a couple of paragraphs before I could tell it to shut-up. Sometimes, as with this particular chapter, I feel challenged to take out my gloves and count the stitches.

 

I was gone a few days. Having fun getting caught up.

[irishfino]

I admit I was fully disoriented as well simply because my brain couldn't accept not knowing when this event happened within the greater timeline. It was a couple of paragraphs before I could tell it to shut-up. Sometimes, as with this particular chapter, I feel challenged to take out my gloves and count the stitches.

 

I was gone a few days. Having fun getting caught up.

 

I would be lying if I said I didn't take some pleasure in confusing people with my writings. I'm a jerk .

[greyjedibp]

Lol I see u like.

[irishfino]

They arrived without incident in the promised timeframe. Itineraries were sent and room keys passed out. Before disembarking, Quinn was sure to inject himself with half a dose of a low end sedative. It was small enough to keep him from falling asleep, but just strong enough to keep him calm around the Sith that were no doubt onboard.

 

“All set, Captain?” Jaesa asked him happily.

 

“Of course,” he said stiffly. He held his hand out in front of him, “After you.”

 

Jaesa curtsied with a giggle then followed his hand down the ramp to the hangar. He was so proper he was even carrying her bag! She would have to get that back soon under the guise of lady problems so she could run to the room before him. And she did just that. He was too busy sputtering at her to offer an escort to the room they would share and he was probably happy enough to stay behind to introduce the Wrath to the gathered Moffs and Sith Lords vying for her attention rather than deal with whatever “lady business” entailed. He suppressed a small shudder.

 

A few ungodly long hours later, Quinn made his way to his shared quarters. He passed his keycard across the small panel next to the door. The door slid open quietly. He took a brief look around. It was exactly as he had ordered it. Ovech had been keen to give him a more “romantic” suite until Quinn had argued otherwise. Vehemently. For hours. He seemed to have no shortage of meddling old men in his life. Jaesa peeked her head up from the couch and smiled at him.

 

“I see you’ve settled in,” Quinn said as he walked into the room.

 

“You could say that,” she said lightly.

 

He placed his bag near the door and pressed a button to close it. He turned to Jaesa with a blank face.

 

“Which bed would you prefer?” he asked stiffly.

 

“Let’s worry about that later,” she said with a smile. “Come sit with me.” She patted the seat next to her and smiled invitingly. He eyed her wearily and slowly made his way to the two-person seating. He sat down lightly and stared at her blankly. She grinned and pulled a small box from under the table. He turned his body toward her slightly, curious as to what the box held.

 

“I heard from a reliable source that you have a soft spot for chocolate,” she said lightly. She opened the box and turned to him, revealing an assortment of small chocolates.

 

It must have been Barnabus. Meddling old man. He took off his gloves and reached for a piece when Jaesa slapped his hand. She tsked at him then pinched a piece between her fingers and held it against his lips.

 

“This is inappropriate,” he muttered. He was careful not to open his mouth wide enough for her to slip the piece in.

 

“It’s just two friends sampling chocolate,” she smiled. “Hurry, it’s melting between my fingers.”

 

“Jaesa,” he murmured.

 

“Shut your mouth for talking and open it for eating.”

 

He obediently opened his mouth. She placed the piece on his tongue then withdrew her hand to suck the chocolate off her fingers. He watched her as he chewed the chocolate slowly. He swallowed a bit roughly when she caught his eye.

 

“Good, right?” she asked quietly.

 

He opened his mouth to respond when she placed another piece against his lips. With gentle pressure, she pushed it between his teeth. He caught her finger between his lips for a brief moment before she slowly put her hand down.

 

“I should stay in the spare room,” Quinn murmured as he chewed.

 

Jaesa smiled and placed another piece of chocolate on his lips.

 

“Jaesa… please,” he said quietly. He closed his eyes as she slipped the piece into his mouth.

 

“We’re just two friends,” she said softly, “enjoying some chocolate together.”

 

He opened his eyes and stared at her with an unreadable expression. His most recent romantic liaison, if it could even be called that, had ended as far away from well as humanly possible. He also had his job to consider. Not to mention his mental and physical imbalances. It was far too risky for all involved.

 

“Jaesa,” he said quietly, “I can’t.”

 

“Can’t what?” she asked innocently. “Enjoy some chocolates?”

 

He stared at her for a brief moment. She was open to this. Very open to this. Quite obviously open to this. Openly flirting and teasing a clearly damaged man. He took a deep, calming breath. It didn’t matter to her. His past didn’t matter; his dreams didn’t matter; only he mattered. His decision made, he fixed her with a stern glare. She looked away nervously.

 

“I’m the only one enjoying the chocolate,” he admonished. He took the box from her hand and grabbed a piece. “Say ‘ah’,” he said sternly.

 

A shy grin passed Jaesa’s features before she opened her mouth and said “Ah.” He placed the piece on her tongue and waited for her to chew.

 

“Wow,” she said quietly, “these are good.”

 

“Quite,” he said lightly. He popped another piece into his mouth and chewed thoughtfully. “You asked Barnabus for help didn’t you?”

 

Jaesa laughed and she stole another piece. “After little Malavai told me you really liked chocolate, I asked your grandfather what your favorites were,” she said lightly.

 

“Remind me to thank him when I see him again,” Quinn murmured.

 

“He’ll be at the ball won’t he?”

 

“Not him.”

 

“Be nice to your grandfather,” she said quietly.

 

The glare he fixed her with this time was real. “I was tortured for most of my childhood with experiments to make me Sith,” he said harshly. She opened her mouth to interrupt him, but he continued. “Not only that, but I was injected with three different versions of the SLV serum which, naturally, caused irreversible mental damage. On top of that, my memories were replaced with false ones to try to hide everything that was done to me. This was mostly successful, mind you.” He paused for breath. “So tell me, Miss Jaesa, how am I to ‘be nice’ to someone who has lied to me my entire life, made me into an experiment, and didn’t have the decency to tell me of his true intentions until he released a monster that I can barely control?”

 

“I thought the two of you were getting along fine now?” she said quietly.

 

“That’s what you focus on?” he asked harshly. His lips curled into a snarl.

 

“What do you want me to say?” she asked quietly. She turned away from him and fidgeted with her fingers. “You act like you’re the only one who has been experimented on,” she muttered angrily.

 

He blinked. “What?”

 

“The Jedi were very curious as to how my power worked. When I went to Tython for training…” she trailed off.

 

Quinn stared at her for a few long moments then offered her a piece of chocolate. She laughed and took it from him.

 

“I think that’s why I’m drawn to you,” Jaesa said quietly.

 

“Like reaches for like,” he said quietly. “Thank you for the chocolate.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

He smiled at her then tossed a piece of chocolate into his mouth. He held out the box for her and gestured for her to take the last piece. She took it gratefully.

 

“These are really good,” she sighed as the last bits of chocolate melted against her tongue.

 

“What can I say, I have good taste,” he said lightly.

 

She turned to him and laughed openly. He graced her with a smile that lit up his face. Good taste, indeed.

 

 

Notes:

 

This piece felt a bit rushed to me, but... it's worth it right? Who really wants to read about an hour long ride to somewhere boring anyway? Believe it or not, this still isn't the part I'm looking forward to.

 

[irishfino]

NSP Thought Process

 

 

I’ve been inspired by Vesaniae’s revelation of her (I think Ves is a girl… forgive me if I’m wrong. I always make writers girls for some reason…) thought process. So here’s mine in all its horribly boring glory.

 

 

If you haven’t noticed already, my stream of conscious is all over the place, which is why the story tends to jump around a bit. I’m the Queen of ADHD writing and my writing reflects that.

 

Oddly enough I have several different versions of this story bouncing around right now. One is much, much darker… probably too dark for the forums… or anywhere near sane people.

 

I have many paths I can take and have taken a few of them only to distract myself with the subplot romance Jaesa and Quinn kind of sort of maybe might have going on. I actually had an ending plotted out, but I can’t get to it now, too many awesome things have happened. And some not so awesome.

 

Take Barnabus for example. When I first wrote about him, he was actually dead and I planned to leave him on Tatooine to die a miserable, lying bastard (runs in the Quinn family, apparently). But I love the guy! He’s hilarious and still yet unexplored.

 

For Quinn, he was actually going to be beaten half to death on many occasions. The first writing I had done with Quinn and his PTSD (which I swear I’ll get back to instead of offhandedly mentioning it every once in a while), he was trying to kill himself because the crew was violently opposed to him being back on the ship. Here’s what was going to happen.

 

- Syla lets Quinn back on the ship immediately after the Transponder Station

- She tells the crew he’s a lying bastard

- The crew takes it out on his hide with Syla’s blessing

- Jaesa would fix him up and begin the romance side plot

 

I’ve always fancied in the back of my mind that Quinn would reveal Darth Baras as his father. It just seemed like a fun and unexplored idea. That combined with Castellan restraints made more sense in my head than “I’m a by the books imbecile who would happily throw away probably my only chance at a happy ending (again, I’m pretty stupid) for freakin’ Darth Fatass.” It also occurred to me that Quinn reminds me of my husband. How much so you ask? Narrow blue eyes, mole on the left cheek (thought my husband’s is by his mouth and is flesh colored rather than black), similar nose, ears, and eyebrows, obsessive about certain things once his mind is set on it, extremely loyal, and utterly adorable when confused. Plus, he played hard to get for personal reasons (which I clearly relieved him of, muahahhaahaahahaaa).

 

At lot of the time, I’m writing off the top of my head. I’ll plot out a scene on paper and discard it just to get the cobwebs out. There are a few I have kept and work to plot toward, but things don’t always flow the way I want them to.

 

Quinn, Sith!Quinn, and His Dreams/Memories

These are fun to write. Why? Because I can torture Quinn rather openly, but leave him physically intact, a little worse for wear mentally, but he can’t be perfect (no matter how much he tries). I refrain from using italics to denote dreams because I want the reader in the moment like Quinn is: suddenly thrust into it. Gives a bit of extra realism to me. I have done it at least once that I can think of in this story... the italics, I mean.

 

As for Quinn himself, I try to keep in as in-character as possible. It’s a bit hard, because I need him to be a lot more flexible than he actually appears in-game. So I beat emotions into him. And out of him. And back into him. He’s so repressed… which is where Sith!Quinn/Darth Quinn/dark Quinn comes in handy.

 

Dark!Quinn is extremely fun to write because he gives no damns. It's also the way I wish Quinn would act sometimes. Stop bottling things up man, you're going to explode like a Sith with the Rakghoul Plague!

 

I like to think that Quinn is more complex than he puts on.

 

Jaesa

I find her extremely interesting. Depending on your choices, you can sway her to take one path over another. Most of her past is a giant blank space, so I take liberties with her. I haven’t managed to get into her head yet. She’s likable enough. Unfortunately, my marauder finished up Light!Side Jaesa’s story arc a long time ago. I remember her being extremely concerned with saving light aligned Sith. It’s her little pet project that challenges her on multiple levels.

 

Syla

She is loosely based on my Dark!Side marauder (that’s right I have two marauders). Very loosely based. My DS!Marauder was started just so I could romance Quinn, even with the knowledge of the impending events. Quinn continued to piss me off to no end, though. -1 affection my a*s you as*y a*s.

 

In my writings, I try to take the road less traveled, but I’m finding there a lot of people with the same ideas or similar ideas of why Quinn is so… Quinn. I tend to trend toward writing dialogue to set the scene then writing the details later. This doesn’t always work out the way I want it to, what with having to fill in the major details that led to the dialogue exchange, but it works well enough.

 

Writing ticks: I tend to start in the middle of a scene or dream for a few reasons. One, I'm evil and it's fun to confuse people. Two, I swear I have ADHD. Three, I like to backtrack, dunno why, just do.

 

Hope you enjoyed my random brain babble… Thanks for reading.

 

Edited August 30, 2012 by irishfino

[Vesaniae]

NSP Thought Process

 

I’ve been inspired by Vesaniae’s revelation of her (I think Ves is a girl… forgive me if I’m wrong. I always make writers girls for some reason…) thought process. So here’s mine in all its horribly boring glory.

 

Always interesting to see other peoples' thought processes! Writing is such an interesting thing. And yes, I'm a girl.

[bright_ephemera]

Excellent, more story process thinking! I rather enjoy trying to get my bearings in your hcaracters' minds as they struggle to do the same.

 

If you're curious, I've uploaded all my conversations with LS Jaesa to a Youtube playlist, for all your "Lady, I said I wasn't into kicking puppies, that didn't mean I wanted to overthrow the government" needs!

 

I find it fascinating and amusing how many people come up with similar yet different takes on Quinn and other characters, and what wild directions the same made-up background "fact" can be taken in.

[Reil]

I already consider Jeasa too immature for someone like Quinn, but I am reeeeaaally starting to not like Jaesa on a whole different level. When she started comparing her few years at the Jedi Hogwarts to Quinn's childhood and post childhood as if they could even relate to each other.... Things just got real bad this side of the screen for her.

 

 

NSP Thought Process

 

 

I’ve been inspired by Vesaniae’s revelation of her (I think Ves is a girl… forgive me if I’m wrong. I always make writers girls for some reason…) thought process. So here’s mine in all its horribly boring glory.

 

 

If you haven’t noticed already, my stream of conscious is all over the place, which is why the story tends to jump around a bit. I’m the Queen of ADHD writing and my writing reflects that.

 

Oddly enough I have several different versions of this story bouncing around right now. One is much, much darker… probably too dark for the forums… or anywhere near sane people.

 

I have many paths I can take and have taken a few of them only to distract myself with the subplot romance Jaesa and Quinn kind of sort of maybe might have going on. I actually had an ending plotted out, but I can’t get to it now, too many awesome things have happened. And some not so awesome.

 

Take Barnabus for example. When I first wrote about him, he was actually dead and I planned to leave him on Tatooine to die a miserable, lying bastard (runs in the Quinn family, apparently). But I love the guy! He’s hilarious and still yet unexplored.

 

For Quinn, he was actually going to be beaten half to death on many occasions. The first writing I had done with Quinn and his PTSD (which I swear I’ll get back to instead of offhandedly mentioning it every once in a while), he was trying to kill himself because the crew was violently opposed to him being back on the ship. Here’s what was going to happen.

 

- Syla lets Quinn back on the ship immediately after the Transponder Station

- She tells the crew he’s a lying bastard

- The crew takes it out on his hide with Syla’s blessing

- Jaesa would fix him up and begin the romance side plot

 

I’ve always fancied in the back of my mind that Quinn would reveal Darth Baras as his father. It just seemed like a fun and unexplored idea. That combined with Castellan restraints made more sense in my head than “I’m a by the books imbecile who would happily throw away probably my only chance at a happy ending (again, I’m pretty stupid) for freakin’ Darth Fatass.” It also occurred to me that Quinn reminds me of my husband. How much so you ask? Narrow blue eyes, mole on the left cheek (thought my husband’s is by his mouth and is flesh colored rather than black), similar nose, ears, and eyebrows, obsessive about certain things once his mind is set on it, extremely loyal, and utterly adorable when confused. Plus, he played hard to get for personal reasons (which I clearly relieved him of, muahahhaahaahahaaa).

 

At lot of the time, I’m writing off the top of my head. I’ll plot out a scene on paper and discard it just to get the cobwebs out. There are a few I have kept and work to plot toward, but things don’t always flow the way I want them to.

 

Quinn, Sith!Quinn, and His Dreams/Memories

These are fun to write. Why? Because I can torture Quinn rather openly, but leave him physically intact, a little worse for wear mentally, but he can’t be perfect (no matter how much he tries). I refrain from using italics to denote dreams because I want the reader in the moment like Quinn is: suddenly thrust into it. Gives a bit of extra realism to me. I have done it at least once that I can think of in this story... the italics, I mean.

 

As for Quinn himself, I try to keep in as in-character as possible. It’s a bit hard, because I need him to be a lot more flexible than he actually appears in-game. So I beat emotions into him. And out of him. And back into him. He’s so repressed… which is where Sith!Quinn/Darth Quinn/dark Quinn comes in handy.

 

Dark!Quinn is extremely fun to write because he gives no damns. It's also the way I wish Quinn would act sometimes. Stop bottling things up man, you're going to explode like a Sith with the Rakghoul Plague!

 

I like to think that Quinn is more complex than he puts on.

 

Jaesa

I find her extremely interesting. Depending on your choices, you can sway her to take one path over another. Most of her past is a giant blank space, so I take liberties with her. I haven’t managed to get into her head yet. She’s likable enough. Unfortunately, my marauder finished up Light!Side Jaesa’s story arc a long time ago. I remember her being extremely concerned with saving light aligned Sith. It’s her little pet project that challenges her on multiple levels.

 

Syla

She is loosely based on my Dark!Side marauder (that’s right I have two marauders). Very loosely based. My DS!Marauder was started just so I could romance Quinn, even with the knowledge of the impending events. Quinn continued to piss me off to no end, though. -1 affection my a*s you as*y a*s.

 

In my writings, I try to take the road less traveled, but I’m finding there a lot of people with the same ideas or similar ideas of why Quinn is so… Quinn. I tend to trend toward writing dialogue to set the scene then writing the details later. This doesn’t always work out the way I want it to, what with having to fill in the major details that led to the dialogue exchange, but it works well enough.

 

Writing ticks: I tend to start in the middle of a scene or dream for a few reasons. One, I'm evil and it's fun to confuse people. Two, I swear I have ADHD. Three, I like to backtrack, dunno why, just do.

 

Hope you enjoyed my random brain babble… Thanks for reading.

 

For dark reboots with more edge and less restraint there is Writing.com and Deviant Art. Both allow you to add Adult tags to keep the kiddies out. We'll both pretend that actually works

Edited August 30, 2012 by Reil

[irishfino]

Always interesting to see other peoples' thought processes! Writing is such an interesting thing. And yes, I'm a girl.

My thoughts are all over the place. All the time. Always. Forever. Redundantly. And, yes, writing is rather interesting. It's my favorite hobby.

 

Excellent, more story process thinking! I rather enjoy trying to get my bearings in your hcaracters' minds as they struggle to do the same.

 

If you're curious, I've uploaded all my conversations with LS Jaesa to a Youtube playlist, for all your "Lady, I said I wasn't into kicking puppies, that didn't mean I wanted to overthrow the government" needs!

 

I find it fascinating and amusing how many people come up with similar yet different takes on Quinn and other characters, and what wild directions the same made-up background "fact" can be taken in.

It's fun trying to get into someone else's head and thought structure.

 

And thanks for the link. It really helps!

 

I already consider Jeasa too immature for someone like Quinn, but I am reeeeaaally starting to not like Jaesa on a whole different level. When she started comparing her few years at the Jedi Hogwarts to Quinn's childhood and post childhood as if they could even relate to each other.... Things just got real bad this side of the screen for her.

 

For dark reboots with more edge and less restraint there is Writing.com and Deviant Art. Both allow you to add Adult tags to keep the kiddies out. We'll both pretend that actually works

There's more to Jaesa's story than she's letting on. Remember, it's easy to throw Quinn for a loop with a simple statement if he's focused on talking about something else. This may come back to bite Jaesa on the hind end.

 

And thanks for the info on those sites. I'll consider penning the dark parts to the story. We'll see.

 

 

Thanks for reading everyone!

[irishfino]

Little Malavai ran through the halls in search of the Captain. The Captain tended to wander these days, straying from the Control Center in favor of reviewing memories. It was more like torture. He studied the dreams, the memories and entered the data into his datapad for later recollection. He carefully cataloged new information alongside old in a bid to understand. No matter how many times he tried to reconcile the data, he couldn’t. His brain would not allow him to overwrite his false memories with the actual memories. He had no conclusive evidence as to why that was, but he had a few ideas. His brain, already fractured, was protecting itself from a full meltdown or there was still a keyword floating around, unused preventing him from replacing the false memories with the correct ones. Both were forms of protection, one within and one forced, but he was curious as to which was the case.

 

Malavai’s ear twitched. Someone was waiting in the dark atrium. He smiled to himself when his senses tingled with recognition. He took off down a different hallway, his little feet slapping happily against the marble floor. He opened the door to the dark atrium and called out. Jaesa turned to him with a broad smile.

 

“Hey there,” she said happily.

 

He waved her in then offered his hand when she stepped through the doorway.

 

“Are you not talking today?” Jaesa asked gently.

 

He shook his head sadly. He wasn’t comfortable talking anymore. The Captain tried to engage him in conversation, but even the Captain couldn’t draw a word from him. He was ashamed. He felt like he was a lie. His memories, the things he experienced before the experiments and after. Were they all lies? Was he a lie?

 

Jaesa firmly clasped his little hand in hers. Poor boy seemed rather sad. She couldn’t help but wonder what happened to him. She hoped Quinn wasn’t being too harsh on little Malavai. At her thought, Quinn popped into existence next to her.

 

“Hello,” Quinn said with a grin.

 

Little Malavai fixed Quinn with his most impressive glare, which looked sorely out of place on his young face.

 

“Still not talking?” Quinn asked Malavai.

 

The boy growled in response. Quinn rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

 

“He’s been like this since Tatooine,” Quinn explained to Jaesa.

 

Malavai urgently tugged Jaesa’s arm, trying to pull her away from Quinn.

 

“What happened to him on Tatooine?” Jaesa asked quietly. Little Malavai tugged on her harder. She couldn’t know about this. He looked up at her with shining blue eyes and tugged her arm again.

 

“He found out we were the one to kill Mother,” Quinn said absently.

 

Little Malavai made a strangled noise and let go of Jaesa’s hand. He tried to tug himself away, he had to get away. She would hate him as much as he hated himself. Jaesa suddenly let go of his hand. He fell to the ground from the sudden lack of support. He scrambled from the floor and bolted down the hallway and around a corner before Jaesa could stop him.

 

“You killed your mother?” Jaesa asked quietly.

 

“Yes,” Quinn murmured absently. “The memory you saw was a false one.” He paused for a moment and chewed the inside of his cheek. “After the first found of experiments, I was incredibly unstable, more so than I am now. Malavai…” he paused in thought, “hasn’t taken it well.”

 

“Did you know?”

 

“Of course. I’m the one who did it.”

 

“You’re not in the least bit guilty over that, are you?” Jaesa asked angrily.

 

He stared at her sidelong. “No,” he said firmly.

 

Jaesa suppressed the shudder that ran down her spine. He really was Sith.

 

“Don’t be so surprised,” Quinn said evenly. “You’ll never get to the Captain if you can’t appreciate all aspects of him.”

 

Jaesa turned her attention from the hall to the Quinn next to her. He was gone. Little Malavai peeked his head around the corner and waved her to him. Jaesa smiled as she walked toward him. She stopped next to him and knelt down to bring them face to face.

 

“It’s okay,” Jaesa said gently. “It wasn’t your fault.”

 

The little boy looked down at his feet and wiggled his toes.

 

“Do you want a hug?” she asked quietly.

 

Malavai nodded his head vigorously. She opened her arms to him and was nearly tackled to the floor. Malavai buried his head into her shoulder and cried. She stroked his back gently. She murmured comforting words and rocked him to and fro.

 

The Captain responded to the strange warm tingling sensation that signaled Jaesa’s arrival. He stepped from one of his many memories and followed the feeling to the entryway of the dark atrium.

 

“When did you get here?” the Captain asked stiffly.

 

Malavai twisted in Jaesa’s arms to face the Captain. He had been carefully avoiding his older self out of sheer fear. The Captain hadn’t taken the news well, any of the news.

 

“Why didn’t you bring her to me right away, Malavai?” the Captain asked calmly.

 

The little boy shrugged then pulled himself from Jaesa’s grip. He faced the Captain and imitated the Captain’s favorite stance: parade rest.

 

“Are you alright?” the Captain asked. He had noticed Malavai’s absence. It felt strange not to have the little bugger nipping at his heels.

 

Malavai shook his head.

 

“Are you not talking to me?”

 

Malavai turned to Jaesa then gestured behind him to the Captain. Jaesa nodded at him in understanding.

 

“He’s not talking to anyone,” she explained.

 

“Why not?”

 

Malavai gestured again.

 

“He found out how your mother really died and he doesn’t trust himself any more.”

 

The Captain nodded then dropped to the floor, balancing on his haunches. He tapped little Malavai’s shoulder gently. The small boy reluctantly turned to him, careful to keep his gaze on his bare feet. He wiggled his toes.

 

“That wasn’t you,” the Captain said quietly. Malavai’s head shot up, confusion clear on his little face. “Remember the first SLV treatment?” Malavai nodded. “It split us. Anything that happened after that point was done by Quinn, not Malavai,” he explained gently. Malavai sniffed then rubbed his sleeve against his nose. The Captain gave him a small smile.

 

“Malavai loved his mother very much. Didn’t he?” Malavai nodded harshly. The Captain’s smile widened. He opened his arms and was promptly tackled to the floor by little Malavai. “Don’t hide from me anymore,” the Captain said thickly.

 

“I won’t,” Malavai muttered into the Captain’s chest. “I’m sorry. I thought you would be mad.”

 

The Captain shook his head. With great effort he stood, still clutching little Malavai to his chest.

 

“I don’t blame you for anything,” the Captain said quietly.

 

Malavai pulled his head from the Captain’s chest and stared up at him. “Quinn’s a jerk.”

 

The Captain chuckled and nodded in agreement.

 

“I feel like playing,” the Captain said lightly.

 

“Really!?” Malavai asked excitedly.

 

“I might be drunk on chocolate, but, yes, I feel like playing.”

 

Malavai whooped happily then jumped from the Captain’s arms. Jaesa laughed at the small boy’s antics. He grinned at her then held his hand out.

 

“Let’s play hide and seek,” he said happily.

 

Jaesa smiled and took his hand. As soon as she was on her feet, he started dragging her down the hall. He yelled to the Captain that he had to count to fifty then find them. The Captain smiled to himself as Malavai and Jaesa disappeared from sight. Perhaps it was time she got to know Malavai.

[Vesaniae]

That last bit was adorable. Little Malavai = cutest thing evar.

[bright_ephemera]

That last bit was adorable. Little Malavai = cutest thing evar.

 

QFT. Little Malavai at parade rest? This image is cute beyond words.

[ragnnerok]

“Don’t be so surprised,” Quinn said evenly. “You’ll never get to the Captain if you can’t appreciate all aspects of him.”

 

 

So very true you can't trully understand a person without knowing all sides of them.

[Reil]

There's more to Jaesa's story than she's letting on. Remember, it's easy to throw Quinn for a loop with a simple statement if he's focused on talking about something else. This may come back to bite Jaesa on the hind end.

 

And thanks for the info on those sites. I'll consider penning the dark parts to the story. We'll see.

 

 

Thanks for reading everyone!

 

Hehe it's a lost cause. You won't ever win me over to her side. I can't stand her in-game personality so she has been my least favorite SW companion since I let her up the brow. To say "least favorite" is a courtesy on my part.

 

I await any possible bite on the hind-end with delightful anticipation.

 

This last chapter... awesome.

Edited August 30, 2012 by Reil

[ragnnerok]

When I first played my SW I was straight out LS. I grew to hate jaesa and so I rerolled my SW to go completely dark so much better. She hotter that way too.

[irishfino]

That last bit was adorable. Little Malavai = cutest thing evar.

Ladies love me!

QFT. Little Malavai at parade rest? This image is cute beyond words.

It's so cute, I couldn't resist sketching it. It didn't turn out quite as well as I had hoped, but it's still pretty cute.

So very true you can't trully understand a person without knowing all sides of them.

Jaesa's about to learn this the hard way...

Hehe it's a lost cause. You won't ever win me over to her side. I can't stand her in-game personality so she has been my least favorite SW companion since I let her up the brow. To say "least favorite" is a courtesy on my part.

 

I await any possible bite on the hind-end with delightful anticipation.

 

This last chapter... awesome.

Oh it's going to bite her all right. Might take the whole cheek if she's not careful...

 

When I first played my SW I was straight out LS. I grew to hate jaesa and so I rerolled my SW to go completely dark so much better. She hotter that way too.

The only person who freaks me out more than DS!Jaesa is Kaliyo. *shudders* Freakin' freaks.

 

 

Thanks for reading everyone!

Edited August 31, 2012 by irishfino

[irishfino]

Jaesa and Malavai played until it was time for her to wake up. The Captain popped in every once in a while to check on them, but was otherwise occupied with studying recent memories and events for clues. He was no closer to finding out why he couldn’t overwrite his old memories with the true ones. Even Quinn was at a loss. They stood in the hallway side by side as the Captain input the bits he wished to recall easily later into his datapad.

 

“So, chocolate, huh?” Quinn asked conversationally.

 

“I like chocolate,” the Captain said stiffly.

 

“Oh, yes, I know.”

 

“And what is that supposed to mean?” the Captain asked crossly.

 

“I’ve noticed that Jaesa is abnormally adept at turning a situation around into a pity party for herself,” Quinn said lightly.

 

The Captain quirked an eyebrow and continued inputting information into his datapad.

 

“Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed.”

 

“I haven’t,” the Captain said stiffly. “I’m not good with people or emotions. I don’t always pick up on those things.”

 

“Naturally,” Quinn said, nodding. “Take the dream in the med bay, for example.”

 

“Don’t go there,” the Captain said stiffly.

 

“She turned the focus to her quite quickly.”

 

“That isn’t fair.”

 

“Oh, I sympathize with her. I’m not completely heartless,” Quinn said evenly. He ignored the Captain’s resulting snort. “I just find it funny.”

 

The Captain bristled next to him. “You find her being assaulted funny?” he asked through clenched teeth.

 

“Not at all, not at all,” Quinn said, waving his hand dismissively. “What I find funny is that she made the dream you had all about her.”

 

“She was assaulted,” the Captain said stiffly.

 

“Yes, I’m not doubting or debating that point. Stop focusing on it and think. You have a dream where you are the perpetrator of the assault and she the victim. You avoid her because you feel guilty for having such thoughts. She confronts you, magically knows what your dream was about, and reveals to you that she actually had been assaulted in the past. Suddenly, she’s the focus. There is no discussion on how the dream affected you."

 

The Captain blinked. “What are you getting at?”

 

“Don’t you find it strange how she changes the focus to herself as quickly as she can?”

 

“That wasn’t a fair example,” the Captain said firmly.

 

Quinn rolled his eyes. “Fine, let’s talk about the chocolate then.” He paused and chewed the inside of his cheek. “She used it to distract you from her quite obvious attempt at flirting. Then she mentions your grandfather, which, naturally, sets you off. After your initial rant she reveals she’s been experimented on. This throws you for a loop, derailing your train of thought quite handily. Suddenly, she’s the focus of pity. I just find it funny how that happens whenever you talk to her about your past.”

 

The Captain turned to Quinn, datapad still in hand. Quinn continued staring straight ahead.

 

“You still haven’t stated your point,” the Captain said stiffly.

 

“You’re not thinking straight,” Quinn said evenly. He turned to face the Captain. “This girl doesn’t understand you as much as you think. You’re so desperate for some kind words and attention that you’ve forgotten yourself.”

 

“I haven’t forgotten anything,” the Captain spat angrily.

 

“You seem to whenever you talk to this girl,” Quinn said calmly. “You’ve let her wander around your head for f**k’s sake!”

 

“What is the point of this?” the Captain asked impatiently.

 

“You’re attaching yourself to this girl without fully understanding why. You’re going to get burned. Badly. Stop this nonsense now,” Quinn said firmly.

 

“I’m perfectly fine,” the Captain said stubbornly. “I’m nearly at one hundred percent.”

 

Quinn scoffed. “You’re nowhere near one hundred percent. I’m the only part of you that has functioned and continues to function as intended. You’re not at ninety seven percent, you’re at three percent.”

 

“And you’re conveniently that three percent,” the Captain said angrily.

 

“I’m the only part of you that wasn’t built on a lie.”

 

“You’re the biggest lie of them all,” the Captain spat, slashing at the air angrily.

 

“I was always there. I was simply magnified,” Quinn said calmly. “Stop attaching yourself to this girl because she is willing to listen to your horror stories and give you Jedi hugs after. You’re not doing yourself any favors.”

 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” the Captain said stiffly.

 

“Oh, but I do,” Quinn said condescendingly. “Your relationship with Teala developed out of pure loneliness and desperation. Please, remind me how that turned out for you.” The Captain opened his mouth to respond, but Quinn continued. “Elara Dorne, apple of the Dorne tree, kind to you when you alienated everyone else with your utterly impossible disposition. Tell me how that ended.” The Captain opened his mouth again only to be interrupted once more. “Lord Syla! She embraces your hatred of Broysc and helps you off the Moff. Are you sensing a pattern here, because I sure have! You attached yourself to these women because of some unconscious need to be accepted and wanted, never realizing that it is a double-edged sword. When things turn sour, as they are wont to do, you start seeking out other women to replace them.” The Captain stared at him with a blank face. “Perhaps it boils down to severe mother issues, but the point is there is a pattern. You need to break it. Now.”

 

“I don’t need your help,” the Captain said stubbornly.

 

“I’m the only help you’re going to get,” Quinn said angrily. “If you can’t trust yourself, all parts of yourself, not just the parts you want, how can you trust another person with anything? You’re deluding yourself.”

 

“I’m perfectly fine.”

 

“You are not fine!” Quinn bellowed, his patience finally worn through. “We are not fine! We have never been fine and we will never be fine if you continue down this path! Detach yourself from this girl, detach yourself from Syla, get off that ship and forge your own path!”

 

“You know nothing,” the Captain said lowly.

 

“I know everything we’ve been through. I know every ounce of pain. I know every memory. I know everything you know, I’ve seen everything you’ve seen, I have always been there. This girl is getting in over her head and if you truly care for her you will leave her behind and fix yourself.”

 

“I can’t do that to Malavai,” the Captain muttered quietly.

 

“You’re deluding yourself if you think this is protecting him,” Quinn said evenly. “Stop trying to make amends for a shattered past and move forward. If you’re not willing to then I will.”

 

“Is that a threat?” the Captain asked icily, fixing Quinn with a powerful glare.

 

Quinn scoffed and waved him off. “It’s a promise. Stop trying to fix the past and work on the future or I will lock you away and take control.” Quinn grinned, flashing his teeth at the Captain. “And you might not like my methods.”

 

The Captain stared at Quinn for a long moment. The hallway they were standing in began to shimmer and melt away. The Captain continued staring as everything faded to black. He opened his eyes and focused his gaze on the ceiling. He turned his head to the side to find Jaesa seated on her bed staring at him.

 

“Good morning,” she said cheerfully.

 

He sat up wordlessly.

 

“Everything alright?” she asked gently.

 

“How long were you experimented on?” he asked, his voice rough from sleep.

 

“Oh, uh, not long,” she said quietly. “A few weeks, I think. I don’t really remember much of it.”

 

Quinn nodded to himself. “Why do you think a few weeks of lab experiments is in any way comparable to ten years of torture?” he asked stiffly.

 

“Well I – I don’t,” she stuttered.

 

“You seemed to last night. What changed your mind?”

 

She stared at him for a few seconds trying to read his expression, but he was careful to keep his face blank. His eyes glittered dangerously, but she was unfamiliar with an enraged Captain and did not take heed. He shifted until he was leaning on the palms of his hands with his legs over the edge of the bed, still staring at her.

 

“I was trying to change the subject,” she said quietly.

 

“I noticed. You changed it to yourself. You seem to have a knack for that,” he said tonelessly.

 

Jaesa blinked slowly. She could feel a ripple of anger skitter across her skin.

 

“Did I do something wrong?”

 

“I should think so,” he said calmly.

 

“Talk to me,” she urged him gently.

 

At her calm, pleading he exploded. “You have no idea the horrors I endured and continue to endure long after the experiments finally stopped,” he spat angrily. He grasped the edge of the mattress with both hands to restrain himself to the bed. “There were days I begged for death. Days I begged my grandfather to take me away. I begged anyone who would listen to take me away. Don’t pretend as if your little jaunt through some light experimentation is in any way comparable to the things I’ve gone through.”

 

“I didn’t mean it like that…” she mumbled.

 

“How did you mean it, then?” He glared at her as he waited for an answer. She didn’t have one. “Why am I not surprised you have no idea. Think before you speak, you foolish Jedi.”

 

“I was only trying to relate to you,” she said quietly.

 

Quinn scoffed and crossed his arms. She tore her gaze from his face and looked down at her lap. “I’m sorry,” she said, fidgeting with her fingers.

 

“Be sorry to someone who cares,” he said gruffly.

 

She tilted her head up to face him, eyes shining with unshed tears. The sight disgusted him beyond measure. Pitiful creature trying to feel sorry for herself.

 

“Don’t pretend to be something you’re not in an attempt to endear yourself to someone. They will catch your lies eventually,” he said stiffly. “Now, get out of my sight.”

 

She stood and fled the room. Part of him felt bad for unloading like that. Another part of him felt extraordinarily good for putting her in her place. She would think twice before engaging him in conversation.

 

That settled, he went about his day as usual, starting with the refresher and working his way to getting dressed. He emerged from the refresher with a towel around his waist and was displeased to find Pierce waiting for him across the room.

 

“Hello Lieutenant,” Quinn said stiffly. “To what do I owe the… whatever this is.”

 

Pierce chuckled and pushed himself from the wall he was leaning against.

 

“How many times are you going to send Jaesa running away in tears?” Pierce asked gruffly.

 

“If she can’t handle the things I tell her then she needs to stop asking questions,” Quinn said lightly. He continued his morning routine as if Pierce wasn’t there, letting his towel drop to the floor as he put on his undergarments. Pierce grumbled something and averted his gaze until he heard Quinn’s belt clinking around.

 

“If that is all, Lieutenant, I have a meeting with Major Ovech in fourteen minutes,” Quinn said nonchalantly.

 

“Don’t let it happen again,” Pierce said calmly.

 

“Or what, Lieutenant?” Quinn asked evenly as he slipped on his jacket.

 

“I’ll find a way to make you pay.”

 

Quinn chuckled at that and slipped on his gloves. “I’d like to see you try.”

 

“Trust me,” Pierce said, his eyes sparkling, “you wouldn’t see it comin’ from a mile away.”

 

Quinn slipped his feet into his boots without comment. He adjusted them to the perfect fit then grabbed his blaster from the nightstand. He strode to the door, his back ramrod straight, his face a blank mask.

 

“Try me,” Quinn said lowly, a flash of orange lighting up his eyes. He flashed Pierce a confident grin then marched out the door as if nothing happened.

 

 

Notes:

 

I know what you're thinking: Fino, how are you going to turn this mess into a romance? Why, with magic dear readers. And maybe some sand. I mean glitter...

 

Edited September 1, 2012 by irishfino

[Rabbarabba]

i hate you for making me like quinn....

[bright_ephemera]

I love that you have a fragment that can combine that analytical skill with an actual psychological/emotional clue. Didn't see those criticisms coming, at all. I am slightly disturbed by the fact that, even having some idea what kind of thing Quinn is, I still respect the hell out of him for laying out that brutal interpretation of what he thinks of Jaesa and what he thinks is necessary.

 

Oh, and I love that the Captain's delivery still manages to come out rather tone deaf.

 

In fact, from where I sit it looks like the fragment who can understand emotions doesn't feel them, and the one who can feel them doesn't understand them. (Yes, yes, Quinn has anger and such down pat, but it's all lacking a certain...compassion?)

 

Poor Malavai. You'd probably just better keep playing hide and seek. It's really the game you were made for...

Edited August 31, 2012 by bright_ephemera