Trouble, Destiny, and Other Complications - AU: Caught

[frauzet]

As I said before, I really enjoy seeing Thorns' thought processes and how he makes his decisions. I'm looking forward to seeing the discussion these two get into. The Sith seems pretty cool too. I like that he's very direct.

 

Thank you! The Sith has high empathy. Thorns definitely prefers direct.

 

Back from vacation with the next part:

_________________________________________________________________________________________

 

#14

I take the bottle and open it. Careful now. Just one sip. Let your body get reacquainted with the water. I know the routine from Tatooine. Still it takes all my willpower not to gulp down the whole content. Cool, fresh, and clean. At a pitch we remember to appreciate the simple things. “Talk!” I say after a careful second sip.

 

“You will have noticed robbing a tomb on Korriban was an incredibly bad idea.”

 

“Mistake was, we let ourselves be caught,” I contradict.

 

The Sith chuckles. “Agreed! But I doubt you are aware of all implications.” He pans his gaze over the valley below. “You look down at those slaves, and you deem yourself different from them. Truth is, you are not.” He holds his hand up to stop me from interjecting. “Your case has already been tried, and you have been found guilty. To atone for your crimes you will serve as a slave unto your death.”

 

There is a hum in my ears as his words sink in.

Edited August 15, 2016 by frauzet

[Lunafox]

I don't see Thorns being down for long. He'll figure something out. Though, I must say I am enjoying the Sith, I like that he has a sense of humour.

 

I love these entries, keep 'em coming!

[wangxiuming]

I just love how his personality shines through the entries. And the descriptions along with it are brilliant. So to the point, riveting and amazingly revealing. Keep it up

 

I really agree with Luna's comment here. Every entry drips with Thorns' personality, characterization, and does a really amazing job of putting the reader in his shoes, especially given some entries are quite short. Kudos! Looking forward to seeing what happens next.

 

And is the Sith ever going to get a name?

[frauzet]

I don't see Thorns being down for long. He'll figure something out. Though, I must say I am enjoying the Sith, I like that he has a sense of humour.

 

I love these entries, keep 'em coming!

 

I really agree with Luna's comment here. Every entry drips with Thorns' personality, characterization, and does a really amazing job of putting the reader in his shoes, especially given some entries are quite short. Kudos! Looking forward to seeing what happens next.

 

And is the Sith ever going to get a name?

 

Thank you both for the feedback. You made my day.

 

Guilty! More than 4000 words and no relevant names yet. Of course the Sith has a name, too. But if Knash used it, Thorns hasn't heard it. He was somewhat distracted at that moment. Readers from TDaOC may have recognized the Sith, though. Implants, gray hair, and green eyes =>

Ciner, heir of House Ignis, my Sith Warrior. Meeting Thorns instead of Vette is the first change for him in this AU.

 

Maybe it would have been good to put in some sort of introduction earlier. Honestly it never seemed quite fitting. This isn't a normal social situation among equals where you would introduce yourselves before engaging in a conversation. The Sith knows Thorns' name, but hasn't used it yet. Iirc, I introduced Thorns in my comments. Thorns doesn't know the Sith' name and so far hasn't had a reason to inquire about it. He's not dealing with the guy by choice. Also Thorns hasn't thought of himself by his own name yet. (In #16 he will do so using his real name.)

The two of them will probably exchange names once they've come to some sort of agreement. I don't think either of them will prefer 'Sith' and 'slave'.

 

________________________________________________________________________________________

 

#15

We all knew about the high risk. You don’t fly to Korriban to rob a Sith tomb without talking about some worst case scenarios. Worst case was death, but nobody of us honestly believed they’d die. In case we’d get caught we’d make it back to our shuttle and escape – after a glorious shootout, of course. I think we all watched one or two holo shows too much. Never ever, in all the discussions we had beforehand, slavery was ever an option. It simply didn’t occur to me. It must have to some of my friends. Maybe that’s why we always talked about fighting. They didn’t want to get captured alive.

 

I listen to the Sith and the dizziness grows. The ants in the valley below blur to vague shapes. We had our shootout. Several guards died, some more got wounded, one seriously. I am the only one left to take the blame. Turns out guards have friends, too. Like the four earlier. They have been waiting for me. Every damned guard in this place got a memo with my face. Yes, I know what that means. They’ll make sure I won’t die before lifelong is up.

Edited August 18, 2016 by frauzet

[frauzet]

Since I mentioned it, I might as well post the next part.

 

________________________________________________________________________________________

 

#16

(trigger warning: contains suicidal thoughts)

 

Frang, Nat, don’t you do something stupid! In the back of my mind Ce’na shakes her head. The movements of her lekku betray her agitation. There is always a way out, you just need to find it. The bottom of the valley tempts me with promises of a quick end. A few seconds of free fall. I’d be dead before my brain would register the pain. A few second for my life to flash by before it were over. No, Ce’na’s got a point. I don’t want to give up just yet. She sighs with relief. We’ll work out an escape plan.

 

I break my gaze away from the drop in front of me to look at the Sith. He said plain talking. It’s my best chance to take. “What do you want from me, and what do I get out of it?”

 

“I need you to understand something.” He waits for me to nod before he goes on. “I am a promising acolyte, no more, no less. I can get the guards to back down for a moment. But right now I have nothing more to offer. That will change, though. Once I successfully accomplished my last trial, Darth Baras will appoint me to be his apprentice. Darth Baras is an important man in the Empire. His word carries weight. A lot of his influence will rub off on me. I will not be able to change your verdict. Yet, it will be possible to get you out of here.” The flourish of his arms encompasses our surroundings, all of Korriban’s dry, chilly offering.

 

“Well, if that doesn’t sound great!” I am hardly able to keep my buzz in check.

 

The Sith notices my lack of enthusiasm. Plain talking, not like I’m trying to hide my emotions. “There are places where you would be able to live a decent life with decent work. Mining colonies, agricultural worlds. I would let you pick.”

 

I purse my lips as I stare at my counterpart in disbelief. Wow. Miner or farmer. Top of my list once traveling the galaxy turns out to be boring. And I wouldn’t even be working for myself. There would always be the collar to remind me of that.

 

The Sith observes my play of facial expressions. The corners of his mouth twitch ever so slightly. “Before you make your choice, though, I would ask you to consider the fact that most agricultural facilities do not have anywhere near the security measures Korriban has.”

 

I tilt my head. An agricultural facility, huh? Would he really do this? Sounds almost as if he were helping me to escape. Would he keep his word? Wouldn’t he warn the guards there? Only one way to find out. He’s not offering much, but it’s something priceless, a new shimmer of hope.

[frauzet]

#17

I only need to open the tomb. Utinni! Can’t sell the scrap before it’s garnered. I almost forgot about my little problem. I sigh deeply. As far as I can tell the Sith has been honest with me. And he’ll find out soon enough, even if I lie. “I can’t open the tomb. I told you. I don’t know how.”

 

“But the portal was already starting to open when one of your cronies shut it again. I read the guards’ reports.”

 

“I know how to handle a blaster.” I shrug. “That’s about it. Guess I’m of not much use to anybody.” The loss of my weapons still bothers me. My gait isn’t the same without the familiar load weighing down each step. I crave the comforting feeling of the grips fitting perfectly into the palms of my hands. I crave… — For about the twenty-thousandth time I pat the pocket of my shirt. No toothpicks either. Take away the rest of my clothes and I won’t feel any more naked.

[wangxiuming]

Have you ever considered posting in a longer format? Your entries go by so fast and I want to see what happens next!

[frauzet]

Have you ever considered posting in a longer format? Your entries go by so fast and I want to see what happens next!

 

I'll take that as a huge compliment! Thank you, very much!

In fact at least some of the posts in TDaOC qualify for a bit longer format and I have not given up on that story yet. Several reasons still keep me from writing much, though. The most prominent is time due to working full time again, the second would be the lack of space of my own paired with problems to concentrate in the midst of everyday chaos of real life. (Working on that to find a solution.)

Although my English has been improving since I started to write fanfiction, editing my texts still takes a lot of time.

Many of the posts in this thread are born during lunch breaks, some with a bit of editing after work. Posting these short parts helps me to stay in the habit of writing (and posting) at least semi regularly. As a bonus it keeps me from editing paragraphs umpteen times.

The feedback you guys keep giving me is a huge incentive to keep going.

The format is not perfect, but it's much better for me than not writing at all, since I've come to enjoy writing immensely.

 

 

With this next part this thread has caught up to my tumblr

_________________________________________________________________________________________

 

#18

The Sith ponders what I told him. Eyes unblinking he seems to stare right into my soul. Shimmering flecks appear in his irises, turning them from green to red. I suppress the urge to fidget around on the rock I am sitting on. I hold his gaze.

 

“Do you believe in destiny?” he asks.

 

A shiver runs down my spine. “Every man is the architect of his own fortune!” Not that I made a good job of architecturing mine.

 

“But, have you ever wondered if anybody is messing with your blueprints?”

 

“I usually don’t blame others if my plans turn out to be kark.” Nobody forced me to come along on this stupid mission.

 

“It has been foretold you’d open the tomb for me.”

 

I blink a few times more than is absolutely necessary. Is he pulling my leg or has someone pulled his? “Not sure on which channel this particular transmission came through, but sounds like there was a lot of interference.”

 

The Sith shakes his head. “A few days ago I would have concurred with you.”

 

“Now you don’t?”

 

“Now I don’t. You are my key to the tomb, even if the approach may not be as simple as I had anticipated.”

 

I can’t help but grin. “Sounds about right. Things are never simple where I am involved.”

 

The Sith grins, too. “I appreciate a challenge!” he states. “Will you do your best to help me get into Naga Sadow’s tomb?”

 

“If you’ll get me off this planet!”

 

He spits into his palm and holds out his hand. “Done!”

 

I mirror him, spitting into my own hand before grabbing his. “Done!”

 

He gets up without letting go. Maybe he isn’t convinced I might not take the last chance to jump. With a pull he helps me to my feet. “You put on record your name is Thorns.” The Sith’ gaze flickers to what’s visible of the th0rny twines tattooed to the right side of my scalp, face, and neck. “Appropriate! I will stick to it if you do not want me to use another one.” No, I payed too much for this name to give it up. I shake my head slightly before he continues. “For the task at hand we will forgo decorum. There will be no bonus points for attaching importance to etiquette, and I lack the time to teach you. Therefore you may call me Ciner.”

 

Decorum and etiquette, pfft. Throw some sentient beings together and there are rules for their dealings. Bet I know more than he does. Can’t say I care for his etiquette, though. “Ciner. Okay.” It’s pronounced like incinerate. I immediately link the flecks in his eyes to raging flames. I check, but their color is back to green.

 

“Follow me, Thorns! I have a plan.” The Sith — Ciner — heads back the way we came.

 

I don’t like the idea of someone — anyone — meddling with my life, no matter whether it’s him, some supernatural being, the Force, or destiny, or whatever, but for now I don’t have a better plan than to follow his lead.

 

Note:

I am aware that 'architecturing' isn't a real word, still that's what architects do, isn't it?

 

Edited August 22, 2016 by frauzet

[wangxiuming]

I'll take that as a huge compliment! Thank you, very much!

In fact at least some of the posts in TDaOC qualify for a bit longer format and I have not given up on that story yet. Several reasons still keep me from writing much, though. The most prominent is time due to working full time again, the second would be the lack of space of my own paired with problems to concentrate in the midst of everyday chaos of real life. (Working on that to find a solution.)

Although my English has been improving since I started to write fanfiction, editing my texts still takes a lot of time.

Many of the posts in this thread are born during lunch breaks, some with a bit of editing after work. Posting these short parts helps me to stay in the habit of writing (and posting) at least semi regularly. As a bonus it keeps me from editing paragraphs umpteen times.

The feedback you guys keep giving me is a huge incentive to keep going.

The format is not perfect, but it's much better for me than not writing at all, since I've come to enjoy writing immensely.

 

Your English is quite good! I wouldn't even begin to dare to post fanfiction in my non-native tongue. And as long as it works for you, I'm happy to read in whatever format you choose.

 

The Sith has a name! Looking forward to see what kind of trouble this pair gets into.

[Lunafox]

Ciner!!! Omg, I'm so ashamed I didn't think of that before. I love Ciner in your other version. Awesome stuff and I think your English is great. And whether your entries are long or short, I'll take what I can get!

[MishaCantu]

'architecturing' is a fine word, poetic license and all that. Your writing is wonderful, no matter your native language. The tiny glimpses into the working of Thorn's mind are just enough to keep the appetite whetted for the next installment. I am always looking forward to your next post.

[frauzet]

Your English is quite good! I wouldn't even begin to dare to post fanfiction in my non-native tongue. And as long as it works for you, I'm happy to read in whatever format you choose.

 

The Sith has a name! Looking forward to see what kind of trouble this pair gets into.

 

Ciner!!! Omg, I'm so ashamed I didn't think of that before. I love Ciner in your other version. Awesome stuff and I think your English is great. And whether your entries are long or short, I'll take what I can get!

 

'architecturing' is a fine word, poetic license and all that. Your writing is wonderful, no matter your native language. The tiny glimpses into the working of Thorn's mind are just enough to keep the appetite whetted for the next installment. I am always looking forward to your next post.

 

*blushes* Thank you! I am glad the effort pays off.

I'd be a bit more eloquent, and a lot faster, if I wrote in German, but I wouldn't have such awesome and supportive readers!

 

@Lunafox: Don't worry about Ciner. It's only a sign for how long it's been since my last update of TDaOC

 

______________________________________________________________________________________

 

#19

“You did not take the main entry?” The Sith keeps asking questions about my first expedition into Naga Sadow’s tomb.

 

“Too many guards. We used a ventilation shaft,” I explain. Ciner nods, although for him the guards won’t pose a problem.

 

“Will you find the access to the shaft again?”

 

I stop in mid-stride to take a look around — and to ponder his question. It makes sense. If I follow the route we took back then, I may remember what the others did. Only, we are not on a way to the tomb. Looks more like we are headed to some barracks, probably where most of the guards and soldiers are housed. I am familiar with the general layout of the place. A cliff rises to one side of the valley. Naga Sadow’s tomb has to be somewhere to our right, hidden by another tomb and the curve of the Valley of the Dark Lords. Our path runs roughly at the level of the entrance gate. The shaft’s exit is located somewhere on the plateau above the tomb. A small hole on a big plane. I remember some rocks I might recognize. “Guess I could find it given enough time — and luck. And provided you can get us up there.” I point to the edge of the cliff. “Don’t feel like climbing right now.” I wince as I try to stretch my shoulders. Carefully I pull and breathe with the pain before I let my muscles relax. No, climbing isn’t an option.

 

The Sith’s eyes widen slightly. “Right now? You’d try to climb this wall if you were in better shape?” He shakes his head in what I guess is disbelief.

 

I put my head back as far as the shock collar allows it. The metal chafes at the raw spots on my neck. The thing is kriffing uncomfortable even if it’s not currently used to electrocute me. Though it’s steep, the wall is far from smooth. No overhangs. “Doable. No problem with some climbing hooks and ropes.”

 

Ciner, too, tilts his head to look at the wall before his gaze fixes on me. “You like climbing. It wasn’t the height made you uncomfortable back there sitting on the edge of the cliff.”

 

I don’t feel the usual enthusiasm at the thought of scaling a wall. Still the guy is too perceptive for me to hide he’s right. “An old friend always suggested there had to be some monkeys among my ancestors.” The way Iz used to say it, it wasn’t always meant as a compliment. “Maybe I am just too dumb to realize the danger.”

 

The Sith already teased me about my supposed lack of intelligence. Now he only chuckles but otherwise ignores this assist to ask a question instead. “So, what are you afraid of?”

 

Like I am going to tell him. There weren’t that many monkeys in my lineage. I evade his question by asking one of my own. “What would you have done had I jumped?” He must have realized the idea was tempting. Why risk losing me, if he believes I am the key to his last trial?

 

“Kark!” I yelp in surprise as somethings sweeps me off my feet. It isn’t the flapping of my arms that overcomes gravity. Despite my best efforts I find myself dangling upside down in midair. After the initial shock passes I become aware of the pressure around my ankles. I crane my neck to get a better look, but I can’t see what’s holding me. My groan as I try a situp is echoed by the Sith.

 

“Stop struggling!” he orders through clenched teeth. “Don’t want to crush your bones.”

 

I agree that’s a convincing argument. As if being handled with the Force isn’t creepy enough, the Sith seems to be close to losing control over whatever he’s doing to me. I squash the rising panic, and take a deep breath. Hanging limp, arms dangling below my head, my fingertips brush the sand. I look up to Ciner, whose mouth is contorted with exertion. One of his hands is balled into a fist he has raised to slightly above his head. The muscles in his arm quiver.

 

“Brace yourself!” The order is hardly more than a grunt.

 

I am able to do as I am told when I see the benefit. I manage to get into an awkward handstand and turn it into a forward roll as being slowly lowered turns into getting dropped. Miraculously I thwart the collar’s best attempts to make me break my neck during this acrobatic interlude. I come to rest in a sitting, albeit somewhat slumped, position. Great! Just when I have been managing to ignore the worst of my aches. Judging by the number of limbs fighting over who’s hurting worst, every part of me still seems to be attached in the right place. “Ouch!”

 

The Sith’ grinning face shoves itself into my field of vision. He’s bent sideways to check on me. “Ermm,” he muses, “you are heavier than I had estimated. It is a good thing you decided not to jump. I would have been forced to jump after you in order to save you.” Shaking his head he helps me back to my feet. “That could have become difficult.”

 

I am starting to wonder why people call me crazy.

[MishaCantu]

"I am able to do as I am told when I see the benefit" This is exactly why I love Thorns so much. He can think on his feet, or off them, as the case may be. And yes, he is one of those crazy like a fox type of guys. I really like your Ciner also. I have always appreciated the more pragmatic sith, those with goals instead of just a sense of cruelty.

 

 

Argh. I almost died when I saw that Ciner asked Thorns what he was afraid of. Felix has asked Tal the exact same thing in my next chapter. I promise it was written before I read your bit, and I like the outcome too much to change it now. However, I suspect that there will be some crossover of simple stuff like that considering how many of us are posting in Fanfic now.

 

[frauzet]

"I am able to do as I am told when I see the benefit" This is exactly why I love Thorns so much. He can think on his feet, or off them, as the case may be. And yes, he is one of those crazy like a fox type of guys. I really like your Ciner also. I have always appreciated the more pragmatic sith, those with goals instead of just a sense of cruelty.

Thorns would probably have been among those guys back at home when I was young, who decided at 4 am after the end of the public festival, to drive to Paris to have a cup of coffee. (That's about 500 km.)

Immo an empire full of picture-book villains simply doesn't work. There may have been times where some infighting may have made some kind of sense to weed out the weak. But with an impending war with the Republic, killing each other can't be the only goal.

 

 

Argh. I almost died when I saw that Ciner asked Thorns what he was afraid of. Felix has asked Tal the exact same thing in my next chapter. I promise it was written before I read your bit, and I like the outcome too much to change it now. However, I suspect that there will be some crossover of simple stuff like that considering how many of us are posting in Fanfic now.

Don't worry about that. I have been there. I think it was you who used the fire/frying pan saying in a comment. And I had already used it in one of the following parts that had already been published on my tumblr but not here. It's happened to me with stories by other writers on the forum, too, and with more than just a sentence. Probably even more often than I know, because I have not read them all. We have all been influenced by the same media.

In certain situations there are only a number of things that make sense. And as you said there are a lot of active writers here. It's impossible to avoid similarities.

Edited August 23, 2016 by frauzet

[wangxiuming]

It was definitely pretty hilarious imagining Thorns being dangled in the air; his reaction and thought-process to that experience made for entertaining reading.

 

 

It's happened to me with stories by other writers on the forum, too, and with more than just a sentence. Probably even more often than I know, because I have not read them all. We have all been influenced by the same media. In certain situations there are only a number of things that make sense. And as you said there are a lot of active writers here. It's impossible to avoid similarities.

 

You guys aren't the only ones! I see a lot of unintentionally similar threads and plotlines from my own story to other writers' on this forum as well. I agree with you frauzet, it's only natural that sometimes similar themes and questions get posed by different authors.

 

 

[frauzet]

I have been out and about for a few days and am trying to catch up on some RL matters. As a result I didn't write much, and I am not satisfied with what little I did write. Since I am not sure more editing will help, I am going to post this part anyway. I hope I'll get back into the flow.

 

_________________________________________________________________________________________

 

#20

What is the weight of a gaze? It can’t be too heavy or looks could kill. Does a lingering one weigh more than one that only brushes you? When you sense someone watching you, is that what you feel? I never thought about it before. If you add up enough gazes would that result in a noteworthy burden? At least that would explain why every step I take is more difficult than the last. It’s hard to keep my head up and my shoulders squared. I stare at the back of the Sith’ head, ignore the people watching us, ignore the hatred in their eyes. Their silent accusation can’t touch me.

 

My shoulders slump with relief as the door closes behind me. It’s only a brief respite. A few rash words, a raised fist, and Ciner’s weapon vibrates beneath my chin. I don’t know how it got there, but I do know that if I had a double chin it’d be gone now. I don’t dare to swallow. An Adam’s apple might not be essential to opening a tomb. I value mine anyway.

 

“Get him out of here!” The brown haired ball of fury nods towards the door. Her fists quiver at her sides. Her right is just a twitch away from the butt of the blaster on her hip. She won’t shoot me although she wants to. I’d be already dead otherwise.

 

Slowly I lower my arm. My cheek stings. The metallic taste of blood spreads in my mouth. My lips weren’t in good condition before she hit me. Instinct told me to hit her back. Given the Sith’ weapon is close to drawing blood, this doesn’t look like the best idea. She called me a murderer. I said I had only defended myself. Her slap took me by surprise.

 

“I need him, Marun!” Ciner states, his tone calm and quiet despite the flecks of fire dancing in his eyes again.

 

“I don’t ca—” the woman takes a deep breath while we stare at each other. Whoever claims brown eyes are warm hasn’t seen hers yet. Her gaze is fixed on me as she addresses Ciner. “What for? He is a criminal without any remorse.”

 

Remorse? Does she think we should have let ourselves be shot without resistance? The guards opened fire as soon as they saw us. There was no offer for surrender. It doesn’t matter I was convicted in some farce of a trial without even being heard. I shot to defend myself and my friends. Her opinion doesn’t matter. Anyway, people with better arguments usually don’t hit their opponents. I lift my chin a bit higher, and it’s not because of Ciner’s saber.

 

My posture, my countenance must betray my thoughts. Her muscles tense. One wrong word and she’ll hit me again. “Damned, Ciner! I was one of the medics treating the wounded. I do not want him here.”

 

“This can’t be easy for you. Still I need you to patch him up. He’s part of my last trial, Marun.” Ciner focuses on her. “I need your help!”

 

I am glad she rounds on Ciner now. “You expressly forbade me to interfere with your trials. Expressly! Against your father’s orders. You claimed it would be cheating. And now you’re going to cheat for this stinking piece of filth?” She wrinkles her nose.

 

I am too tired to muster the strength to express my anger. It wasn’t my choice not to take a shower in weeks. A wave of pain makes me blink. I am not going to cry in front of this b.itch. It wasn’t my choice to…

[MishaCantu]

Glad you're back. The first paragraph was insightful and quite lovely to read. I have the distinct feeling that even if the medic decides to help, she won't be too gentle in her handling of Thorns, I don't envy him the experience.

 

Ciner asking for help is interesting since he wanted none prior to this latest trial. I think you conveyed what you intended with this posting.

[wangxiuming]

I know you said you weren't satisfied with this latest post, but I really liked it. Thorns' thoughts are really fun to read, and to see the universe through his eyes is engaging.

 

I stare at the back of the Sith’ head, ignore the people watching us, ignore the hatred in their eyes. Their silent accusation can’t touch me.

An Adam’s apple might not be essential to opening a tomb. I value mine anyway.

 

These idle thoughts flit by in a second and yet still manage to convey so much personality. Kudos!

[Lunafox]

Welcome back And as always I really enjoyed reading Thorns's thoughts. In particular, I really liked the questions posed in the first paragraph. It's interesting, it does make you wonder, cause you can feel if someone is watching you...you can just tell, and I find that fascinating. Looking forward to the next part!

[frauzet]

Glad you're back. The first paragraph was insightful and quite lovely to read. I have the distinct feeling that even if the medic decides to help, she won't be too gentle in her handling of Thorns, I don't envy him the experience.

 

Ciner asking for help is interesting since he wanted none prior to this latest trial. I think you conveyed what you intended with this posting.

 

Thank you

 

Marun is one of the main reasons Ciner isn't your typical Sith. Sh:oe's a good person, I like her, but right now she is really angry, and I can't blame her. As much as Thorns claims self defense, he was a member of a party of thives and the guards he shot were doing their job.

I hope I'll be able to show some more of her.

 

I know you said you weren't satisfied with this latest post, but I really liked it. Thorns' thoughts are really fun to read, and to see the universe through his eyes is engaging.

 

These idle thoughts flit by in a second and yet still manage to convey so much personality. Kudos!

 

Thank you! It's not always easy to shove the doubts aside. I am grateful for the positive feedback.

Welcome back And as always I really enjoyed reading Thorns's thoughts. In particular, I really liked the questions posed in the first paragraph. It's interesting, it does make you wonder, cause you can feel if someone is watching you...you can just tell, and I find that fascinating. Looking forward to the next part!

Thank you! There are quite some idioms concerning gazes, and a lot of them suggest that kind of an interaction takes place when you look at someone.

 

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,...

 

________________________________________________________________________________________

 

#21

 

A faint metallic clang wakes me up. The cafpot? There may still be hope for me. My brain is wrapped in cotton wool. Keep your eyes shut, don’t move, I tell myself. Savor a few seconds more without a headache. I’ll never drink again. Well, not until Taunt convinces me otherwise once more. I just can’t resist her, and she knows it. Not that I’m going to complain about her taking advantage. The way she moves on the dance floor takes my breath away. Once she gets going nobody bothers to watch the holo dancers anymore. The sway of her hips holds a myriad of promises, and her lekku underline the truth of every one of them. I once asked Flash what her lekku say when she’s dancing. He only laughed at me and shook his head. I think that evening ended more drunk than some of the others. Dancing does make thirsty.

 

There is an unfamiliar beep somewhere to the left of me. Strange. I can’t smell any caf. Instead I smell some antiseptic. Something is wrong. I open my eyes, but only for a second. The glare of the ceiling lights forces me to shut them again. When I try to shield them with my right arm, that’s when I discover I am shackled. The cot I am lying on protests as I thrash around in a fit of panic. The movement confirms all my limbs are secured.

 

“Keep still!” a quiet but strict voice orders, driving the remains of fog from my brain.

 

The pointlessness of my struggle is obvious. I obey and take a deep breath for calm. Blinking I open my eyes. There she is. Marun the Sith called her. This hasn’t been a nightmare. Or maybe it’s fitting to say this is a nightmare. “What did you do to me?” I demand.

 

She snorts. “Not what I wanted to do, that’s for sure.”

[wangxiuming]

Argh, another ending just as I'm getting really curious about what happens next!

 

Looking forward to your next post.

[MishaCantu]

Nice flashback. Now I can't wait to see what happens next.

[frauzet]

I am still here, and I am finally done with the DvL-Event. Some HC FPs turn into nightmare mode when you do them with PuGs.

 

Thorns deigned to talk to me today, so here is the next part:

 

_________________________________________________________________________________________

 

#22

 

Marun stares at the injector in her hands. I stare at her. Unbidden, several nasty components the device could contain come to mind. The galaxy provides a wide variety of deadly poisons, from those killing a human in the blink of an eye, to those that make you wish, you already were dead, first. Most of them are easily available, if you know whom to ask. I watch her tap the cylinder. She doesn’t need poison. Does the injector contain enough air to kill me? I don’t want to find out!

 

She looks down at me, and every instinct yells at me to get away from her. I won’t give her the satisfaction to see me squirm, though! Some instrument starts to beep. An unpleasant smile appears on her face. I try to breathe deeper and more evenly. My effort obviously doesn’t do much to control my pulse, and blood pressure. The beeping continues, intensifies as she bends down to me.

 

Kark! Forget about saving face. “What’s in there?” I move my body away from her as far as possible, the whole ten or so centimeters.

 

She looks at me, at the injector, back at me, and sighs. “I don’t like you!” she says, her voice kept carefully neutral. “And I don’t like what you are doing to me!”

 

Wait? What I am doing to her? “Lady, the last time I checked, I was bound to your cot.”

 

Her eyes hold my gaze. The smile has vanished. “I haven’t had an awful lot of choices in my life, but I chose to be a decent person. I won’t let you stroll by and take that away from me. Just because you’re an a.sshole doesn’t mean I have to be one, too. Everyone’s responsible for their own actions. Don’t mistake mine for weakness!” She picks up a small bottle and shows it to me. “Restorative injection. Ciner convinced me this won’t be wasted. You might want to thank him when he’s back.”

 

I recognize the label. Yes, that’s harmless stuff. If she hasn’t swapped the bottle’s content. I haven’t seen her fill the injector. The device could contain something else. Only — there is no need for her to lie to me. I am helpless. She isn’t Knash. But sadists don’t wear a label on their forehead. A small voice in the back of my mind tells me I am acting paranoid. While that may be true, I am still not in a safe situation. Ciner trusts her, and he needs me. We made a deal. But why would he honor it? He can kill me as soon as I am no longer of use. Kark this line of thought. How about you concentrate on the here and now? Time for another deep breath. The gadget monitoring my life signs is still beeping.

 

“Relax, and turn your backside to me!”

 

I do as she tells me, at least as far as my bonds allow me to. She tugs my pants down below my butt. The thought, that there’s probably not much left to see, makes me oddly self-conscious. She hates me, apart from being almost old enough to be my mother.

 

“This is ridiculous,” I hear her mutter as she disinfects the puncture site.

 

I couldn’t agree more. The odor of the disinfectant covers up my stench. The mix is still far from pleasant, though. The p.rick is hardly perceptible, followed by a slight pressure as the fluid is pumped into my gluteal muscle. Marun readjusts the waistband of my pants. With bated breath I wait for my body’s reaction. There is none. I’ve not been poisoned. After a few seconds the beeping stops.

Edited September 13, 2016 by frauzet

[MishaCantu]

I'm so happy Thorns deigned to whisper in your ear. He certainly has every right to question everyone's motives, he has been a prisoner for so long it has to affect how he views things. He still has the snarky thoughts, which I adore so much.

 

Marun's temptation was a nice bit as well.

 

Here's to the next, cheers.

[wangxiuming]

I'm enjoying the character development. Quite an effective scene to reveal a bit about Marun's character and principles, as well as personality. Kudos!