Two things. I don't disagree with a majority of your post, but two things really got to me. First of all, you do not need mouseover healing to be good. If you're really that desperate to have mouseover healer to function, you need better reflexes. It's that simple. It shouldn't take you but a split second to target someone, and it shouldn't be the difference between life and death.
That said, people need to understand that this is not WoW. SWtoR does not use the same engine, it's not even on the same playing field. Their graphics engine is a great deal more powerful, and more draining on older computer systems. WoW, even when it was newly released, had been coded to be kinder on older machines. That was what made it more accessible. In short, if you're experiencing such horrendous lag, turn your graphics down or invest in a new card/machine.
Overall, a good post. The UI is a little... behind the times, and though it's primitive and lacking a few nice components, it will not make or break a good healer. Work with what you have, it's what good healers have always done. WoW didn't always have such a nice, clean UI, or an excessive number of addons to choose from, and yet, vanilla healers did just fine, tackling some of the hardest content in the game without the hand holding of addons that made things easier.
Over time, things will get better, things will get easier. For now, use what you have and understand the game developers are still learning what works and what doesn't.