lord-durpp Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 .. my dad says it is unreasonable that i play more than 1.5 hrs a day, 3 days a week. I must prove him wrong. Discuss! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warfishnow Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 That's fine, but say he can only watch TV for 1.5 hrs 3 days a week... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Koalachan Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 Do you live in his house? If you do, and that is the restriction he puts on, you are stuck with it. if you don't live with him, than its up to you what a reasonable play time is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
haliy Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 Do you live in his house? If you do, and that is the restriction he puts on, you are stuck with it. if you don't live with him, than its up to you what a reasonable play time is. ^^ this ^^ His house, his rules Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avinshara Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 Look at it this way: the more you follow such restrictions now, the better will be the chance that you won't have to follow them as an adult. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerilynn Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 (edited) I don't know how willing your dad is for compromise, but here are a couple of suggestions - 3 times 1.5 would be 4.5 hours a week, maybe instead of splitting it across three days, see if you could split it how you like - two days a week? one? "Time equals money" - Often times one can do extra chores to earn funds. Maybe there are some extra chores or activities that he'd be willing to have you do in order to earn extra game time. --- As for comparing the game to TV, there is another thread in these forums, somewhere, (I'll try to find it), in which someone posts some very good arguments in favor of the game. (Edit: See bottom of thread) --- However, as you are young, and still being provided for by your parents, (they provide your food, lodging, clothes, etc.) you are required to follow their rules. Even my 19 year old son who still lives with me follows my rules. On the other hand, you are approaching, (if not already in, as I'm assuming that you are early to mid-teens), that point in life where you can impress your parents by showing that you are capable of making choices that are appropriate for adults. Choices of this nature are not easy. I'm referring to doing things like NOT doing a particular activity that you find fun, but doesn't help the household, (hanging with friends, computer time, that sort of thing), and instead, without being told, voluntarily do your chores, even better, do additional chores - yard care, clean house, clean kitchen, offer to watch younger siblings, keep your room/computer areas clean, etc. I'm sure you've heard this advice before, and it is frustrating to follow, but think about what your parents do. 40 hours a week working to bring home money to pay bills for needs and wants, plus all the household chores that you and your siblings don't do. This is what YOU will be doing in about 10 years or so. By showing your parents that you are willing to make their lives easier by taking on some of their chores, as well as showing that you are getting ready for taking on that part of life for yourself, you will probably be able to convince them to give you more time for the things you want to do. Sounds contradictory, I know, give up your time to gain more time, but that's something those of us who are living on our own do all the time - split up our time into what must be done and what we like the most, removing those things that aren't as productive, and those things that aren't quite as enjoyable, so that we can fit in the things that matter. tl:dr version: Show your dad that you are more responsible than he thinks, and he might let you do more less-responsible things like more video game time. ~ Cerilynn Edit: The above noted post that compares the game to TV is on the third page, in the thread So I tried to tell my wife..., about half way down, by Katzith. Edited March 10, 2012 by Cerilynn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baradanga Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 The Above poster makes some very good points during the course of her post. Today many young pre 20's youth spend far too much time on video games at the expense of outside activities or even family time. The over all imagination of our young people today is being stunted by such video games and many start developing bad habits which actually hurt their own health. Having your father and mother limit the time you can play on a video game will in the end have you making realistic choices in your live and establish better personal habits of time management which will benefit you in your later professional life. It may seem harsh to you now but in the future you will see that they only had your best interest in mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soultranna Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 .. my dad says it is unreasonable that i play more than 1.5 hrs a day, 3 days a week. I must prove him wrong. Discuss! What else do you do? 4.5 hours a week isn't really all that much (I personally spend up to 4 hours a NIGHT online, mostly MMO's, and longer on weekends when I'm not working.) But, I also have a house to manage, so there's a couple hours a day spent keeping things up beforehand, and a few times a week I'll spend hours doing chores instead of playing, because they need to be done and there's no one else to do them. It sounds like your dad is wanting you to learn to ration your entertainment, so that when you do get 'out on your own', you're already cool with the idea, and don't struggle with it. I also agree that if you volunteer your time to help out with things instead of being required to do them, the game time restrictions will probably relax a bit as you demonstrate responsibility and initiative (he doesn't have to worry, cos he knows YOU can manage your time on your own, see?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lord-durpp Posted March 10, 2012 Author Share Posted March 10, 2012 you guys are right that they are my house's rules, and i respect those, but i was just seeing what other people think Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lord-durpp Posted March 10, 2012 Author Share Posted March 10, 2012 also, I have only gotten my si to level 30, and i have been playing since about a week after i came out ( if you were wondering) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sumfizz Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 your dad pays the bills. get some perspective kid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sumfizz Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 I don't know how willing your dad is for compromise, but here are a couple of suggestions - Parents don't have to compromise with their kids. Anyone who says otherwise is a tool and asking for trouble. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAM_FOX_HOUND Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 OP, maybe you could try to negotiate say 2-3 hours every other weekday and 1 whole day for Saturday, because 1.5 hours doesn't really give much to complete quest (or gain at least 1 level), also you wont be able to maximize your subscription time. Try to do chore bargains as the others have suggested. Make the parents impressed by showing them that gaming is not really the priority, just a short term goal. Trust me, too much gaming could really mess one's priorities (sports practice, dates, family ties, even exercise lol). I just get the 2 hours daily game time as a reward for myself completing tasks in real life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerilynn Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 (edited) Parents don't have to compromise with their kids. Anyone who says otherwise is a tool and asking for trouble. No, parents don't HAVE to compromise. However, with how I was raised, and how I raised my son, compromise was a way to avoid many problems. It also teaches the child how to use the ability to compromise in situations outside of the family, among friends, and later, at work. See, compromise is something done on BOTH sides. It's based on the theory that if one party gives a little, then so will the other. Compromise between parent and child can also be described as a reward system. If the child does something to help or positively impress the parent, then the parent rewards the child by letting something happen that wasn't previously allowed. In a sense, as a child grows, compromise happens even without the participants being aware of it. A 5 year old would not be allowed to be alone at home, but a 10 year old might be allowed to be alone at home long enough for the parent to go grocery shopping, and a 16 year old not only might be allowed to be alone at home for an entire day, but even to be responsible for someone else's child during that time. (For the examples above, ages vary depending on the maturity level and dependability previously shown by the child. I allowed my son to remain alone at home over an entire weekend, including the responsibility of getting to school on the Monday following and had no problems. My husband's grandfather was once EXPECTED to stay home, and guard the farm with orders to shoot to kill, (yes, you read that right), if anyone he didn't recognize came on the property... at age 5.) When did these changes happen? What caused them to happen? In my opinion, the changes occurred due to gradual compromises between the child and parents - the child proved, in various ways, their ability to be responsible enough to be trusted to be at home alone, and in exchange the parent lessened the level of restrictions, granting the home alone time. Yep, that's compromising. The level of compromise activities varies in every family, even in the same family with differing levels between different children. Compromise happens. It is best when it is used as a tool to teach and mature. It does not have to be a route to spoiling a child. ~ Cerilynn Edit: Oh, and my son just reminded me that no matter how good you are creating compromises with your parents, reminding them that you will be selecting their nursing home isn't a good idea. Edited March 10, 2012 by Cerilynn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sumfizz Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 No, parents don't HAVE to compromise. However, with how I was raised, and how I raised my son, compromise was a way to avoid many problems. It also teaches the child how to use the ability to compromise in situations outside of the family, among friends, and later, at work. See, compromise is something done on BOTH sides. It's based on the theory that if one party gives a little, then so will the other. Compromise between parent and child can also be described as a reward system. If the child does something to help or positively impress the parent, then the parent rewards the child by letting something happen that wasn't previously allowed. In a sense, as a child grows, compromise happens even without the participants being aware of it. A 5 year old would not be allowed to be alone at home, but a 10 year old might be allowed to be alone at home long enough for the parent to go grocery shopping, and a 16 year old not only might be allowed to be alone at home for an entire day, but even to be responsible for someone else's child during that time. (For the examples above, ages vary depending on the maturity level and dependability previously shown by the child. I allowed my son to remain alone at home over an entire weekend, including the responsibility of getting to school on the Monday following and had no problems. My husband's grandfather was once EXPECTED to stay home, and guard the farm with orders to shoot to kill, (yes, you read that right), if anyone he didn't recognize came on the property... at age 5.) When did these changes happen? What caused them to happen? In my opinion, the changes occurred due to gradual compromises between the child and parents - the child proved, in various ways, their ability to be responsible enough to be trusted to be at home alone, and in exchange the parent lessened the level of restrictions, granting the home alone time. Yep, that's compromising. The level of compromise activities varies in every family, even in the same family with differing levels between different children. Compromise happens. It is best when it is used as a tool to teach and mature. It does not have to be a route to spoiling a child. ~ Cerilynn Edit: Oh, and my son just reminded me that no matter how good you are creating compromises with your parents, reminding them that you will be selecting their nursing home isn't a good idea. the world doesn't compromise with you. don't give kids false expectations from an unforgiving world. your last paragraph proves my point. he controls you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lunazen Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 (edited) I really like Cerilynn's post. As a parent, I personally despise the "my house my rules" thing. I only uphold that for serious stuff that I refuse to bend on (like, say.. violent behavior). For all else, I am very open to compromise. You know your dad--is he willing to compromise? Does he cave to logic? If so, try reasoning and bargaining with him, and be 100% willing to uphold your end. If all else fails and he won't bend, then he won't bend. Nothing you can do. As for this "it's an uncompromising world" bit (Sumfizz), we teach our kids how we want the world to be, and how we want them to be in the world. They are open to change, and they are the future. I'd much rather see a cooperative world, and that is how I raise my children. It is not a weakness. Edited March 10, 2012 by Lunazen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avinshara Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 the world doesn't compromise with you. don't give kids false expectations from an unforgiving world. your last paragraph proves my point. he controls you. Is that you, Jean-Paul Sartre? I wondered where you went... Sunfizz is right: the world is a horrible, unforgiving place, full of bears and ebola, and ebola's kids don't get to compromise, so why should you? Anyway, the nice thing about being human beings, capable of reason and compassion and whatnot, is that you can make compromises with each other, if you wish to. But the point remains that you really don't have much room for argument, unless you start providing for yourself. It might seem unfair, but instead of arguing, why not try to take on some responsibility? When you start to provide for yourself, you'll have earned the right to decide for yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerilynn Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 (edited) the world doesn't compromise with you. don't give kids false expectations from an unforgiving world. your last paragraph proves my point. he controls you. The world IS unforgiving. However, the world does compromise. Lack of compromise results in a black and white world, and the world is actually made of shades of gray. The only place I can think of where compromise is not considered a good thing would be in the military. Outside of the military... Look at politics in the government - when both parties don't compromise, nothing happens. Look at economics - sellers compromise on their prices, lowering them to get consumers to buy the products. The faster version of this is known as haggling. Look at employment - employers willing to take on less skilled employees in exchange for paying lower wages, nowadays, employees are willing to take on lower paying jobs in order to have a job. Even some teachers offer compromise - in exchange for giving a student a higher grade, the student must do extra credit work. All of these are examples of compromise. Oh, and the comment by my son? I don't suppose you noticed that he said -DON'T- use that information? To rephrase his point - blackmail isn't compromise. ~ Cerilynn (OP: Sorry for hijacking the thread. ) Edited March 10, 2012 by Cerilynn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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