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Star Wars Jokes


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Couldn't find a joke thread, so I'll make one. I'll start with my awful puns...

 

What's Lord Silthar's favorite internet browser?

 

...Mos Ila Firefox

 

What's Darth Revan's favorite song?

 

..."Rakghouls in Taris" - Jay-Z and Kanye

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Darth Baras' force code:

 

Cake is a lie,there is only pie

 

through pie i gain calories

 

through calories i gain fat

 

through fat my belt shall be broken

 

the recliner will free me.

 

ok this one made me chuckle.

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Darth Baras' force code:

 

Cake is a lie,there is only pie

 

through pie i gain calories

 

through calories i gain fat

 

through fat my belt shall be broken

 

the recliner will free me.

 

there is no excuses, there is laziness.

 

there is no fat, there is the gym.

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TOR characters' greatest fears:

 

Overseer Harkun: Parents' Evening at the Sith Academy. "I electrocuted little Tommy with Force Lightning to stretch him because he's such a gifted pupil!"

 

T7: Tin openers.

 

C2-N2: That players will talk to each other and find out that he's moonlighting as ship droid on every ship in the fleet to earn extra wages. That's why he's useless- he's knackered!

 

The Dark Council: That the Dark Council Chamber will run out of tea and chocolate hob-nobs mid-way through a council session.

 

Corso Riggs: Suffers from a pathological phobia of Jawas, beards, and Risha's toecaps.

 

Vette: Is scared someone will find out that when they're both on crafting missions for their respective players, she and Khem Val meet up and book a little hotel room somewhere. He likes her to wear leather and whip him, she likes him to call her 'Mistress Death', and beg.

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Couldn't find a joke thread, so I'll make one. I'll start with my awful puns...

 

What's Lord Silthar's favorite internet browser?

 

...Mos Ila Firefox

 

What's Darth Revan's favorite song?

 

..."Rakghouls in Taris" - Jay-Z and Kanye

 

I'd hope Revan had better taste in music, and it should be "Rakghouls of Taris" by Warren Zevon.

 

"Light Side and Dark" by Black Sabbath (with Ronnie James Dio singing)

"The Memory Doesn't Remain" by Metallica

"The Wreck of the Endar Spire" by Gordon Lightfoot

 

among others.

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Why female Jedi Consular get so few flirts compared with anybody else in the game and/or universe:

 

Most men just don't see the playful, 'playing hard to get' side of high-impact gravel to the face.

 

 

A Jedi Guardian and a Sith Juggernaut sight each other on opposite sides of the field of battle.

 

{FORCE-LEAP}

{FORCE-LEAP}

{FORCE-MID-AIR-COLLISION-CLANG}

{FORCE-FALL-TO-GROUND-IN-DAZED-HEAP}

 

 

 

Revan is merely resting. He's pining for the fjords.

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Vette: Is scared someone will find out that when they're both on crafting missions for their respective players, she and Khem Val meet up and book a little hotel room somewhere. He likes her to wear leather and whip him, she likes him to call her 'Mistress Death', and beg.

 

I lol'd at this one. I always though Mako and Gault did soemthing like this while Torian and I were out fighting... :p;)

 

But I have one for Skadge: Skadge enjoys a secret life. When sent on crew skills, he goes out to cantinas Nar Shadaa (or any cantinas on any planet for that matter) dressed in a Slave Dancer's outfit, a wig, and terrible makeup. He dances the nigth away with Huttese guards.

Edited by Kikilicious
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Revan is merely resting. He's pining for the fjords.

I just snorted wine out of my nose.

 

In other news, Star Wars in-universe pickup lines? One possibility that I imagined Doc trying out on my Sentinel:

"You must be a devotee of Juyo, the way of the Vornskr. Why? Because that *** has me paralyzed."

Edited by Meira_Arirai
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Darth Baras' force code:

 

Cake is a lie,there is only pie

 

through pie i gain calories

 

through calories i gain fat

 

through fat my belt shall be broken

 

the recliner will free me.

 

I'm 99% Sure you got this from someone's Signature.

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