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Tip: How I've found groups with PM


Stenrik

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It is entirely rude. You're using a feature that is intended for private conversations between two people that both know each other, and both consent to communicate with each other. You're directly imposing yourself on complete strangers for your personal gain. You're no different from the gold sellers that randomly PM people. That's why people get offended and put you on ignore. Most gold sellers are extremely polite in their PMs, so that makes it ok?

 

No thats your personal opinion and youre clearly in the minority.Like someone else said this is a SOCIAL game and if the devs had followed your faulty logic you would only be able to pm those on your guild and friends list.

 

I agree that spamming the same person over and over is wrong but a simple "No thanks Im not interested" or just ignoring is sufficient.You do have the option to turn the chat window off, trust me do it all the time when Im hunting.

 

Gold sellers affect everyone in the game by damaging economies and sending the price for items thru the roof, being friendly and asking someone if they would like to join a group at the same level can hardly be compared to the damage theyve done.

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How is PMing someone out of the blue, rude?

 

Maybe not rude, but when i'm not flagged for LFG, i do find the "wanna come heal X?" whispers annoying. If only there could be macros, so i could just press one button for "No thanks. But when i will want, i will flag myself for LFG"...

 

Most of the time i just don't answer anything if i'm in middle of something...

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I've had a large number of people sand me replies "You are now going on ignore" doing this, and then the rest of the time no response at all. Randomly PMing people is very rude.

 

You are probably doing it wrong. I used to do this in wow before dungeon finder but so far I don't have to because I trio with a healer and tank and I dps along with my companion (we are only lvl 35 and so far we've cleared every instance up to the prison one).

 

But anyway here's how you do it so you don't seem rude.

 

"Hello, I'm making a group for x flashpoint. So far we have x classes, would you like to come as x spec?"

 

That way is fine. But doing something like, "We need a 4th person for x instance. pst if you want to come" isn't exactly the best way to go about it.

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I play Republic on a low pop server, and spamming general is just not the best way to find groups for flashpoints or heroics. And nobody uses the built in "LFG" system. So I have an alternative. (This sounds like a lot of work but it's really not.)

 

Intstead of spamming general, I:

 

1. "/who" the applicable zone.

 

2. Sort by class.

 

2. Simply PM whoever I think would do the job. So if we need a healer, I'll start with PM'ing sages. "Hey, would you be interested in healing for X in 10 mins? We could really use a good healer."

 

Doing this, I seem to get a bite pretty fast. I've never had anyone be mad at getting PM'd out of the blue. They just say they're busy or don't respond at all. I'm sure some don't even see it, but there are usually enough players to make up for it.

Actually, I think people are flattered to actually be sought out instead of just tagging along.

 

Does anyone else do this? Does it work at higher levels? (I'm only in my 30's so far.)

 

 

(By the way, I'm not against a better LFG tool, cross-server grouping, or server merges. Just thought this works well in the meantime.)

 

I haven't done it but if someone pm's me to join their group for something, I'll join :) could always use more social points, not they're worth anything..., always here to help someone else out.

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Really?

 

Or wait.. lemme google something..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u70EYe4vy8U

 

There..

 

I mean come on.. it is an Multiplayer game. How do you think to meet new people and make it more multi without whispering? Look, I feel tone of whisper is very important, as I said above, but if someone politely asks me to heal/tank for them than they will get a polite answer that is either positive or negative back.

Whispering is not 'entirely rude', the whisperers themselves can be though.

 

Now get out from under your anti social rock and enjoy other people's company when they are pleasant and don't generalize all whisper as rude.

You know as well as I do that there is a huge difference between "meeting" someone, and randomly PMing strangers. You meet people by opening yourself up to being met i.e. you're grouped with them, or you've put out a looking to sell message, etc. Someone being a tank or healer that you need to fill a group isn't them being open to be "met" via a random PM by everyone in the game looking to make a group.:rolleyes:
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I just prefer to advertise groups as enticingly as possible. I mean really, who wouldn't want to group up with me. You could go wipe on a flash point for hours with some random people. But when you go randomly wipe a flashpoint with ME for hours, you get Style.

 

"SUPER******YTIMEFUN LFG FOR HOT BOARDING PARTY Action, 1 MORE!" while suggestively /winking at an npc,

 

or

 

" So I was talking to your mother the other day, and we both agreed that since neither yourself, nor your father had completed colicoid war games, she was going to run away to new hampshire with me where we would purchase a six pack of faygo, and listen to barry white, all while talking about what pathetic losers people who don't finish colicoid war games are."

 

Make it interesting please if you are going to spam general.

 

"LFG 1M Colikoid DPS SUPAHEALS PLZ" gets old.

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It is entirely rude. You're using a feature that is intended for private conversations between two people that both know each other, and both consent to communicate with each other. You're directly imposing yourself on complete strangers for your personal gain. You're no different from the gold sellers that randomly PM people. That's why people get offended and put you on ignore. Most gold sellers are extremely polite in their PMs, so that makes it ok?

 

Try being a tank, or a healer, and see just how open you are to random PMs from people wanting to know if you'll join their group. :rolleyes:

 

1. This game is a Massive Multiplayer Online Roleplaying Game. What you're describing as "rude" is the epitome of someone with anti-social behavior. Are you sure this is the right game for you? Is normal social interaction rude to you?

 

2. The PM system can be used between two people - now as to whether they know each other, why does it matter? Are you so anti-social that you dislike to talk to people you don't know? Why did you get it in your head the notion that the PM system should only be used by two people who know each other? It's certainly not designed with that limitation in mind, now is it?

 

3. In reality, when somebody you don't know wants to send you a business proposal that will not only enrich them, but can enrich you at the same time - do you automatically shut down that proposal because you don't know that person? If so, are you prepared for the consequences of such a missed opportunity?

 

4. Sending a PM politely asking whether that person would be interested in joining your group is nothing AT ALL like "gold farmers" (as you put it) sending you tells about their practice. I'm sorry, but if you can't realize the difference between somebody who's just trying to play this game and perhaps involve you with it, and somebody who is trying to exploit you and your money - well I don't know.

 

Such thought processes is so far removed from reality that I can only suggest going to see a professional for help.

 

Also, let me blow your mind: You're talking to absolute strangers about a topic. Tell me, if we were to listen and agree with your way of thinking, then we would be ignoring your point of view now, wouldn't we? A bit of a double standard you have there, isn't it?

Edited by pursang
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I actually enjoy it when I see a tell asking me to group. I might otherwise do nothing but hey, now I have an option.

 

If you ignore or consider it rude, go play a solo game. If someone says "Hi" on the street, you just ignore them? Meh

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I'm very passive about grouping. I don't actively seek it out very often, and I always forget to pay attention to General to see if players are trying to form groups.

 

But if I get a PM invite for a Flashpoint, I almost always jump at the opportunity. It's not that I don't want to group, it's just so inconvenient that I usually don't think about it while questing. However, if someone else is doing the organizational work, then why the hell not!

 

Once you're done, add everyone to your friends list and now you have a group of potential players to group with next time. Everyone wins.

 

I have seen some people get ignored by doing this, but that's cool, since the people doing the ignoring are clearly unfriendly, and you wouldn't want to group with them anyway.

Edited by Mannoth
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But yeah, it's not rude at all. Sorry if you feel like it is, but you really don't speak for the majority of people, I don't think. And believe me, as a well-known(ish) player of a 3-way hybrid class in the server's most visible guild, I know very well how many people whisper you if you're a tank or whatever. It ain't no thang.

It ain't no thang to you. People telling racist jokes in general "ain't no thang" to me. So because telling racist jokes in general chat "ain't no thang" to me, then it should be perfectly acceptable for everyone to do it, amiright? Oh and I play the #1 healer iin the #1 guild in WoW, so my opinion means more than yours. I win. :rolleyes:

 

(the latter is untrue, but, well, as if that means anything.......

Edited by Umbral
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If you ignore or consider it rude, go play a solo game. If someone says "Hi" on the street, you just ignore them? Meh

 

Actually i do because people IRL are creepy. If I'm walking down the street and someone walks up to me to say Hi, it's not usually a good thing. YES that makes me rude but I've also been threatened with a knife after said Hi as they tried to take my purse, I've been followed if I respond on other occasions, or nagged for money and some beggars get really mean if you don't give them anything after their polite greeting.

 

 

Now that does not reflect my earlier posting about in game chat because it's a different situation. While I know that no situation is completely danger free, I'm more like to respond to a random hello in a store than on the street etc.

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If people are getting angry for getting a PM they should take a chill pill. In a time where people are complainting about lack of server community, this kind of advise it precisly what most servers could do with.

 

I always seem to drop what I am doing at the moment and go do X or help with Y. All you gotta do is ask... nicely :p

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Yeah, like I said above. Greet them, or ask something like "looking for a good healer/tank/dps". Just saying "good" is sort of a compliment in itself after all. If they agree to join, they are affirming that they are good at what they do. Just a little psychology. ;)

 

And yeah, don't message the same person twice if they haven't responded back. That, I agree, is rude and spammy.

 

I never have a problem being PM'd and it's often quite nice to have that personal touch!

 

But contary to Stenrik if someone asked for a "good" healer I'd be less likely to go as although I consider myself a "good" healer I would view someone who specifically asked for one to maybe bit a bit elitest and not the type of group I'd like to join.

 

Just be polite and don't be a douche if I say no - seriously why some people feel the need to tell me I'm ruining their game because I've politley told them I'm busy and can't play is mindboggling.

Edited by The_Butler
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Now that does not reflect my earlier posting about in game chat because it's a different situation. While I know that no situation is completely danger free, I'm more like to respond to a random hello in a store than on the street etc.

 

It really is a matter of being in your comfort zone or not. Walking down the street minding your own business - well there's not much comfort to be had there. Sitting in front of your computer, being able to respond to people when and how you please can really make all the difference for many people.

 

And that's not to say you're not social, it just means your social in a different way.

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No veteran MMO player with at least a decade under his belt how about you?

 

O god what a sad statement here :(

 

on topic

 

Pming is not a nice way fo forming a group. Imagine if every minute a tank gets a pm for a fp. "want to do...."

 

"fancy a ......"

"Want to tank a......"

 

Its a stoneage way of grouping, having a chat channel for grouping is the way, if a tank isnt there then he simply dosnt want to group. Badgering people into grouping with u is just fecking annoying when im trying to pvp/quest of just chatting with friends.

 

Im against pm spam and its happening all to often without a lfg tool/chat.

 

(We use global chat on my server but not everyone has caught on)

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Try being a tank, or a healer, and see just how open you are to random PMs from people wanting to know if you'll join their group. :rolleyes:

 

Healer here.

 

I've been PM'ed out of the blue with requests to heal, and as long as I am not busy doing something else, I say YES.

 

And if I happen to be busy with something else, I respond politely: "No thank you, but thanks for the offer!"

 

The HARRUMPH I AM OFFENDED reactions in this thread make me wonder if some of you were raised by wolves. ;)

Edited by Merytneith
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Healer here.

 

I've been PM'ed out of the blue with requests to heal, and as long as I am not busy doing something else, I say YES.

 

And if I happen to be busy with something else, I respond politely: "No thank you, but thanks for the offer!"

 

The HARRUMPH I AM OFFENDED reactions in this thread make me wonder if some of you were raised by wolves. ;)

 

"want to heal...."

"want to heal...."

"want to heal...."

"want to heal...."

"want to heal...."

"want to heal...."

"want to heal...."

 

its getting annoying every fecking minute. When 3 ppl pm u at the same time its starts to annoy

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1. This game is a Massive Multiplayer Online Roleplaying Game. What you're describing as "rude" is the epitome of someone with anti-social behavior. Are you sure this is the right game for you? Is normal social interaction rude to you?
Being a mmo has nothing to do with imposing yourself on strangers. Being a mmo does mean that you're in a social environment, and as such you are expected to follow the norms of social ettiquette. You go to any city and just walk up to random strangers and ask them if they want to go do something with you. I'm sure you'll find the odd person that'll be friendly to you, but I'd advise making sure you have some decent health coverage first though.

 

2. The PM system can be used between two people - now as to whether they know each other, why does it matter? Are you so anti-social that you dislike to talk to people you don't know? Why did you get it in your head the notion that the PM system should only be used by two people who know each other? It's certainly not designed with that limitation in mind, now is it?
I'm not saying it should only be used by two people that already know each other, but it should be used by two people that are open to knowing each other. As in, I put a looking to sell message in general or trade chat, I expect responses. I put out a LFG message I expect responses, etc etc. Not I rolled a tank, so I expect random PMs the entire time I'm logged in the game. :rolleyes:

 

3. In reality, when somebody you don't know wants to send you a business proposal that will not only enrich them, but can enrich you at the same time - do you automatically shut down that proposal because you don't know that person? If so, are you prepared for the consequences of such a missed opportunity?
This isn't reality though (maybe that's the problem with some of you?).

 

4. Sending a PM politely asking whether that person would be interested in joining your group is nothing AT ALL like "gold farmers" (as you put it) sending you tells about their practice. I'm sorry, but if you can't realize the difference between somebody who's just trying to play this game and perhaps involve you with it, and somebody who is trying to exploit you and your money - well I don't know.
Oh please. If you're randomly PMing players to fill a group it's all about you. It's for your gain. Maybe not entirely, and maybe the odd person you randomly bother gets some benefit as well, but for all the rest? Ya, you're just spamming them with an offer that is all about your personal gain. Absolutely no different than a gold seller. If a gold seller gets a hit from one of their random PMs, that's someone that want to use that gold sellers services? So both benefit right? ......

 

 

Also, let me blow your mind: You're talking to absolute strangers about a topic. Tell me, if we were to listen and agree with your way of thinking, then we would be ignoring your point of view now, wouldn't we? A bit of a double standard you have there, isn't it?
You wrote this, and you talk to me about seeking professional help? lololol
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Oddly I'm starting to see a correlation here.Seems like NICE people dont mind getting PMs while antisocial people have a problem with it.Its a win-win any way you look at it because some people insist on being miserable no matter what.You can see the difference in their replies.

 

You know you can just turn the chat window off...that shouldnt be a problem for you since you dont want to be bothered anyway.

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(sigh).

 

Every time I post on an MMORPG forum, its like the enforcers of the internet being "SERIOUS BUISINESS" raise their heads.

 

as someone who has played MMORPGS since UO, BWAH. wow. someone made a suggestion fo you NON social people to get groups, and you turn it into a giant metaphysical thing about your real life contact preferences, and how you prefer to have life interact with you.

 

Have fun with your games, as a suggestion though. It just seems crazy how some people genuinely want to help people out only to get smashed by waves of spergetastic responses.

 

*Doubleshootyfingers*

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I hadn't known that tanks/healers got so many messages. If it's literally every couple minutes, yeah, I can see how it might annoy some people.

Seemed like I was the only person who pm'd, so I thought it wasn't that frequent...

 

 

However, I personally would love to receive pm's for groups. Being a lowly dps, I don't think that's ever happened. But I'm looking forward to it on my tank and healer alts.

Edited by Stenrik
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The only time whispering someone out of the blue should be considered rude is when they are obviously too busy or not in a position to help you. You don't whisper someone running EV to run a flashpoint with you. You don't whisper someone doing dailies on Ilum to come help you with your heroic quests on Voss.

 

But that isn't what the OP is doing. If you have a problem with someone on the same planet as you whispering you to say they're starting up a heroic quest group and asking if you'd like to come along, then you probably shouldn't be playing a social game like an MMO.

Edited by Therrak
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I play Republic on a low pop server, and spamming general is just not the best way to find groups for flashpoints or heroics. And nobody uses the built in "LFG" system. So I have an alternative. (This sounds like a lot of work but it's really not.)

 

Intstead of spamming general, I:

 

1. "/who" the applicable zone.

 

2. Sort by class.

 

2. Simply PM whoever I think would do the job. So if we need a healer, I'll start with PM'ing sages. "Hey, would you be interested in healing for X in 10 mins? We could really use a good healer."

 

Doing this, I seem to get a bite pretty fast. I've never had anyone be mad at getting PM'd out of the blue. They just say they're busy or don't respond at all. I'm sure some don't even see it, but there are usually enough players to make up for it.

Actually, I think people are flattered to actually be sought out instead of just tagging along.

 

Does anyone else do this? Does it work at higher levels? (I'm only in my 30's so far.)

 

 

(By the way, I'm not against a better LFG tool, cross-server grouping, or server merges. Just thought this works well in the meantime.)

 

I also do this all the time. I always get a group going pretty fast and my friends list is getting bigger. A lot of people are not in general to avoid spam (I only go in general when I am forming a group). Whisper people its gets things done fast.

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